Top Lawyers: Jaime H Davis Of ‘Gailor Hunt Davis Taylor & Gibbs’ On The 5 Things You Need To Become A Top Lawyer In Your Specific Field of Law

… Going through a divorce is often one of the most challenging times in a person’s life. I feel honored to walk alongside my clients and guide them through the difficult decisions that need to be made. I’ve been through a divorce with children myself, and I know firsthand how hard it can be. All too often when we think about divorce, we think of The War of the Roses — two spouses who will stop at nothing to “win,” even if it means destroying the other spouse in the process. Unfortunately, the divorce process doesn’t bring out the best in folks. Contrary to popular belief, I do believe that it IS possible to divorce without destruction of family relationships and the family’s finances.

The legal field is known to be extremely competitive. Lawyers are often smart, ambitious, and highly educated. That being said, what does it take to stand out and become a “Top Lawyer” in your specific field of law? In this interview series called “5 Things You Need To Become A Top Lawyer In Your Specific Field of Law”, we are talking to top lawyers who share what it takes to excel and stand out in your industry.

As a part of this interview series, I had the pleasure of interviewing Jaime H. Davis.

Jaime H. Davis is a board-certified family law attorney and co-managing partner of Gailor Hunt Davis Taylor & Gibbs in Raleigh. She hosts the podcast A Year and a Day: Divorce Without Destruction to help her clients and others navigate divorce without destruction of family relationships and the family’s finances. She has also written a book by the same name. With more than 20 years of experience as a family law attorney, Jaime has guided hundreds of individuals through the process of divorce.

Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series. Before we dig in, our readers would love to get to know you a bit more. What is the “backstory” that brought you to this particular career path in Law? Did you want to be an attorney “when you grew up”?

From the time that I was in the fifth grade, I knew that I wanted to go to law school. Throughout my childhood, I was often told that “you could argue with a wall” and that I should be a lawyer. Early in high school, I had the opportunity to shadow a Wake County district attorney during Wake County Government Day, and that experience deepened my interest in a legal career.

Throughout high school and undergrad at UNC Chapel Hill, I did everything I could to find my way to law school. I thought that perhaps I wanted to focus on criminal law. After taking my first family law class, I fell in love with it and then took every family law class offered at UNC School of Law.

Can you tell us a bit about the nature of your practice and what you focus on?

I have been practicing family law for more than 20 years and am a North Carolina Board Certified Specialist in family law. I’m passionate about helping divorcing individuals navigate through the legal aspects of one of the toughest personal challenges they will endure.

As part of my practice, I also handle family law contracts, including premarital, postnuptial, and separation and property settlement agreements. I also serve as a certified financial mediator.

You are a successful attorney. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? What unique qualities do you have that others may not? Can you please share a story or example for each?

I’d say that the three character traits most instrumental to my career are perseverance, being empathetic and the ability to remain objective.

Perseverance: When I returned from maternity leave after my third child, I came back to an empty case load. My maternity leave was longer than anticipated, in part because my son arrived six weeks early. I had to completely regenerate my client base. I decided at that time to start a podcast as a way to help connect with referral sources and market my practice. Within a few years, I went from having an empty plate to a full caseload, bringing in more revenue than I had ever in my career.

Empathy: More than anything, people going through a divorce just want to be heard. They want their side of the story to be heard. I often find that I need to first connect with a client on an emotional level before they’re ready to hear my counsel. I need to sit with them and be present to their experience and pain.

Objectivity: As my client’s legal advisor, it’s critical to remain objective in order to give solid advice and help the client make the best possible decision for their unique situation. This is also why you don’t represent close friends and family.

Do you think you have had luck in your success? Can you explain what you mean?

I’m not sure I’d say that I have had luck. Rather, I’d like to think that I’ve maximized the opportunities presented to me. I was fortunate to have a great mentor in Carol Gailor, one of the founders of my firm, right out of law school. She taught me everything I know about family law, but I also believe that it was up to me to apply that knowledge.

Do you think where you went to school has any bearing on your success? How important is it for a lawyer to go to a top-tier school?

Absolutely. I consider law school to be the starting point. Law school teaches you how to think like a lawyer; however, when you come out of law school, you know almost nothing about the actual practice of law. It’s important to attend a law school with a clinic program in the third year to provide practical experience.

The University of North Carolina School of Law is great for networking. I continue to stay in touch with many of my law school classmates. Since I live in the Triangle, I frequently meet other attorneys, referral sources and clients who have attended a UNC school. Having this common ground offers an immediate connection and the opportunity to scale my network.

Based on the lessons you have learned from your experience, if you could go back in time and speak to your twenty-year-old self, what would you say? Would you do anything differently?

I would tell my 20-year-old self not to be afraid to step outside of your comfort zone. Great things aren’t going to happen unless you’re willing to take risks. You have to try, even if you’re fearful. Most people are surprised to find out that public speaking is not my favorite, but it’s one of those things that I have to be willing to do. Even now, 20 years into practicing law, I often find myself nervous before speaking before a courtroom. However, something happens the moment that I open my mouth. When I start speaking, I’m no longer nervous.

This is not easy work. What is your primary motivation and drive behind the work that you do?

Going through a divorce is often one of the most challenging times in a person’s life. I feel honored to walk alongside my clients and guide them through the difficult decisions that need to be made. I’ve been through a divorce with children myself, and I know firsthand how hard it can be.

All too often when we think about divorce, we think of The War of the Roses — two spouses who will stop at nothing to “win,” even if it means destroying the other spouse in the process. Unfortunately, the divorce process doesn’t bring out the best in folks. Contrary to popular belief, I do believe that it IS possible to divorce without destruction of family relationships and the family’s finances.

What are some of the most interesting or exciting projects you are working on now?

I’m really excited about the new season of my podcast, A Year and a Day: Divorce Without Destruction. It’s named so because in the state of North Carolina, spouses must be separated a year and a day in order to file for divorce.

Over the course of five seasons, I’ve released 35 episodes on topics ranging from “What happens to the family business in a divorce?” to “Why you should consider individual therapy during divorce.” I just finished recording an episode, which will be released soon, about divorcing a narcissist.

The podcast is a resource for both my clients and others going through a divorce. Often, my clients have questions outside of meetings. In the podcast, we dive into information that individuals often only receive in a one-on-one meeting, which can be costly. This free resource can be accessed by divorcing individuals in their own time. Aside from that, I really love speaking with guests and recording the podcast.

Where do you go from here? Where do you aim to be in the next chapter of your career?

I really feel like I’m where I need to be right now. In addition to being a practicing attorney and a podcast host, I serve as the co-managing partner of Gailor Hunt Davis Taylor & Gibbs. I very much enjoy the business aspect of running a law firm. I like working with my partners to create a successful business and to help make the decisions to ensure the law firm runs smoothly.

Down the road, I’d like to teach family law at a law school. I’ve always thought of being a professor when I’m retired.

Without sharing anything confidential, can you please share your most successful “war story”? Can you share the funniest?

In one of my most memorable cases, I represented the wife of a raging narcissist. The husband lost his job, but he wouldn’t admit it and continued to pretend to go to work. He was essentially living a double life. Eventually, the divorce was resolved with a good outcome for my client. We have stayed in touch, and she recently found the love of her life and remarried. I’m so excited to see her life come around full circle from a disastrous marriage to a loving relationship.

To be completely honest, family law isn’t very funny. However, sometimes you have to laugh at it because otherwise you might cry.

During a very heated divorce case, one couple disagreed about divvying up every single piece of property. The odd thing was that this couple together had millions of dollars. When trying to figure out the distribution of their property, they became laser-like focused on one specific household item — their Dyson vacuum cleaner, not something to which a person typically attaches sentimental value.

It was so perplexing because they clearly had the means to buy a brand new one. It was just the principle of the matter. Toward the end of a very long mediation session about property division, the Dyson vacuum cleaner was the one item that they still couldn’t agree on. I finally offered to buy my client a new Dyson vacuum cleaner. I said, “I will literally go right now to Target and buy you a new one.” I was desperate to get the matter out of the weeds, and that offer sealed the deal.

Ok, fantastic. Let’s now shift to discussing some advice for aspiring lawyers. Do you work remotely? Onsite? Or Hybrid? What do you think will be the future of how law offices operate? What do you prefer? Can you please explain what you mean?

I’m back in the office 3–4 days a week. I find that I’m more efficient at the office than at home, but some days it makes sense for me to work at home. Today I worked from home because of a podcast interview (the sound is better in my home office).

I find that, given the nature of family law, our team is more efficient in the office than working remotely. Our practice is very collaborative, and it’s much easier to pop next door to my colleague’s office to talk through an issue than to meet virtually.

How has the legal world changed since COVID? How do you think it might change in the near future? Can you explain what you mean?

Logistically, there has been a willingness to shift to remote hearings and mediations. Previously, nothing was done remotely. I believe that this shift is one of the bright sides of the pandemic. It’s much more convenient for clients, particularly if there is a party who lives outside of the area.

I’m now doing a lot of virtual mediations, which are more cost-efficient for the client. Rather than being out of pocket for an entire day (plus) at a mediation, I can go back to my office and get other work done when not actively involved in the mediation.

I believe and hope that some virtual hearings and virtual mediations are here to stay. They will likely need to continue when COVID numbers undoubtedly surge again.

We often hear about the importance of networking and getting referrals. Is this still true today? Has the nature of networking changed or has its importance changed? Can you explain what you mean?

Networking and referrals are just as important as ever. It’s the nature of the practice area of family law. The average tenure of an active divorce matter is about a year to a year and a half. While the client may have some needs beyond that, the matter is pretty much wrapped up within that timeframe. What this means is that I need to regenerate an entire book of business every single year.

While some clients will find our firm online, networking continues to be very important for referrals. We gear our marketing to our referral sources, who are generally professionals working with divorcing individuals — therapists, accountants, financial planners, etc. Anyone can go through a divorce, and it’s too hard to mass market to all people. It’s more targeted and effective to focus efforts on reaching the people helping divorcing individuals.

Based on your experience, how can attorneys effectively leverage social media to build their practice?

To gain traction on social media, it’s important to stand out and build your individual brand. Social media offers a platform to stay top of mind with potential clients and referral sources. People connect with people. Sharing my experience as a professional, working parent, and co-parent allows people to get to know who I am.

Excellent. Here is the main question of our interview. What are your “5 Things You Need To Become A Top Lawyer In Your Specific Field of Law?” Please share a story or an example for each.

From my perspective, the following qualities are necessary to becoming a top lawyer in the practice area of family law: breadth of experience & knowledge; specialty certification; thought leadership; compassion & calming presence; and strong relationships with other professionals.

Breadth of experience & knowledge

To effectively advocate for your clients, you need to know so much more than divorce law. Higher-end cases will have complicated financial scenarios, such as executive compensation and business valuations. You need to be able to read and understand not just personal financial documents, but also corporate documents, if one party is a business owner.

Specialty certification

I have attained specialty certification in family law through the N.C. State Bar. This signifies that I have demonstrated knowledge, skill, and proficiency in a specific practice area. Clients and potential clients can rest assured that their matters are in good hands, knowing that I have this expertise.

Thought leadership

I regularly share my knowledge and experience on my podcast. I have also written a book, “A Year and a Day: Divorce Without Destruction,” which is based upon episodes of my podcast. Both outlets help to position me as a credible, reliable and expert resource.

Compassion & calming presence

At some point in a divorce matter, I may end up dealing with adults who are acting like children and letting their emotions and resentment get the best of them. It’s helpful to have a calming presence to diffuse the situation. Being compassionate and connecting emotionally often allows the client to then move beyond the emotions and tap into the more rational side of their brain. If you’re a person who is prone to get easily excited, family law is not the right line of work for you.

Strong relationships with other professionals.

As a family law attorney, I typically turn over my entire book of business within a year or so. Developing strong relationships with other professionals (referral sources) is key to maintaining a steady flow of new clients. My clients also often ask for recommendations for individual therapists, family counselors, child psychologists, financial planners, accountants and other professionals.

We are very blessed that some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch, and why? He or she might see this. :-)

I have to say Oprah Winfrey. Oprah is both an empathetic listener and a masterful storyteller. I imagine that the conversation would be fascinating. I admire her for her talent, business savviness, and humanity.

This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for the time you spent with this. We wish you continued success and good health!

About the interviewer: Chere Estrin is the CEO of Estrin Legal Staffing, a top national and international staffing organization and MediSums, medical records summarizing. She is the Co-Founding Member and Vice-President of the Organization Legal Professionals providing online legal technology training. Chere has written 10 books on legal careers, hundreds of articles and has been written up in publications such as the Los Angeles Times, Chicago Trib, Newsweek, Entrepreneur, Above the Law and others. Chere is a recipient of the Los Angeles/Century City Women of Achievement Award, a finalist for the Inc. Magazine Entrepreneur of the Year award and a Los Angeles Paralegal Association Lifetime Achievement Award Recipient She is a former administrator at an AmLaw 100 firm and Sr. Vice President in a $5 billion company. Reach out at: chere@estrinlegalstaffing.com.