Travel and Personal Growth: Larissa House Of Therapy with Larissa House On Why & How Traveling Can Help Us Become Better Human Beings

An interview with Maria Angelova

Create your own adventure. While you may initially be drawn to a place because you saw or read something that someone else posted, dig deep and ask yourself what you want to get out of traveling. Travel for your own adventure, not to make people wish they had your life or to post the perfect picture or because someone else went there. There’s nothing wrong with getting inspiration to visit places because you learned about it from someone else, but take the time to learn about why you truly want to visit that place, then make it happen.

Thankfully, the world is open for travel once again. Traveling can broaden our horizons and make space for people to become more open-minded. How can travel give us the opportunity for personal growth? What are some ways that travel can help us become better human beings? As a part of our series about “How Traveling Can Help Us Become Better Human Beings”, I had the pleasure of interviewing Larissa House, LCSW.

Larissa House is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and founder of her private practice Therapy with Larissa House, through which she provides mental health therapy to individuals and couples in California, Florida, and (soon) Pennsylvania. Larissa is also an avid traveler, having taken every opportunity possible to travel since high school and recently has been traveling full-time with her family since 2019. She and her husband worldschool their four children and have spent 2 years in Ecuador living in an Indigenous community in the Andes Mountains, 2 months in Mexico, several months in the Pacific Northwest, and recently have taken up pet and house sitting from Seattle to San Diego before they head back to live and travel internationally.

Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Before we dive into the main focus of our interview, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?

I grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area and am the first person on both sides of my family to be born in the United States, with the exception of my dad’s dad who I never got the privilege of meeting because he was a soldier killed in the Vietnam War. My mom is Filipina, and my dad is Korean, Japanese, and Black. I believe my rich cultural heritage, as well as the friendships I have fostered from an early age with incredible people from diverse backgrounds, have helped me nurture a strong appreciation and respect for culture, diversity, and the beauty of humanity.

Even though I grew up in the SF Bay Area, I spent a lot of my childhood summers in Los Angeles with my grandparents. I would stay there for weeks at a time. My cousins, siblings, and I would make forts and play games by day and sleep in wall-to-wall sleeping bags on the living room floor by night. I never realized how small my grandparents’ house was until I grew older. This realization gave me a profound appreciation for the idea that, in my family, there was always room for everyone who wanted to be there.

As a multicultural, second-generation immigrant, there were (and still are!) times when I felt like I was wrestling with my identity, weaving between community and individuality, responsibility and obligation, and expression and silence. But in the same way that I watched my family make room for everyone who wanted to be there, I learned (and still am learning) how to make room for all the parts of me.

What or who inspired you to pursue your career? We’d love to hear the story.

When I was a senior in high school, one of my friends died in an accident while on a trip that I was also on. As I went through the healing process, including my first experience with therapy, I learned so many things about myself and healing.

I learned that although we can’t necessarily see the emotional and mental healing process the way we see the physical healing process, it is absolutely a process, and time doesn’t just heal all wounds. I learned that emotional and relationship healing doesn’t have to be left up to chance and that we can do more than hope that the pain goes away eventually.

As I learned that there are professionals dedicated to helping people heal from emotional pain and they do so based on techniques that have been proven by research to be effective, I knew that I wanted to be part of that healing process for others.

There are many routes to becoming a licensed therapist. For me, the social work route fits because of the profession’s commitment to honoring diversity, promoting social justice, and building community as frameworks to understand and support the individual mental health process.

None of us can achieve success without some help along the way. Was there a particular person who you feel gave you the most help or encouragement to be who you are today? Can you share a story about that?

The person who has given me the most encouragement and inspiration to be who I am today is my 92-year-old grandma, Lolita. The example that she sets of resilience, faith, immigrating from the Philippines with 5 young children, leading a family, changing careers, maintaining connection to people and things of her past while embracing her present, speaking four languages/dialects, and living intentionally inspires me to take risks and be brave. My grandma is the person who unapologetically tells people what is on her mind, and people want to be in her presence.

While she may not fully understand my career and why I choose to travel frequently, she always tells me to “do what you feel called to do” and “follow your dreams”. Having her in my life encourages me to live authentically and be my best with the hope that I share her best traits. I know that I’m wired to thrive because she does.

It has been said that sometimes our mistakes can be our greatest teachers. Can you share the funniest or most interesting mistake that occurred to you in the course of your career? What lesson or take away did you learn from that?

Before I started my graduate program, I had been working with children for the previous 3 years. My colleagues and I would bring the energy of a children’s birthday party entertainer to work every day. My graduate internship with the Department of Veterans Affairs was a 180 degree pivot from my professional experience up to that point. I began my internship working with Vietnam Veterans.

When I was initially trying to engage with my new clients, I wasn’t even aware until my field supervisor pointed out to me that I was bringing a tone and energy that was overwhelmingly higher than the energy level in the room. Not only did I feel embarrassed because I was a passionate and eager-to-succeed grad student, I also became worried that I wouldn’t be able to successfully adapt the way I was used to working to meaningfully connect with a new population.

I took away several lessons from that experience. I learned that we build connection and rapport with others more effectively when we match their energy. I grew my skill in simultaneously matching their energy while also being aware of my own process and honoring my authentic self.

I learned that when we stop seeing feedback as a personal critique and instead receive the feedback as a tool to help us improve our craft, we can grow and adapt to be better and stronger people, and in my case, a stronger clinician.

Can you share your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Why does that resonate with you so much?

“I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.”

~Maya Angelou

This quote resonates with me because I think that when we’re in the middle of our suffering, our mind has a hard time seeing past our present pain. Sometimes, we have to take the word of those who have been there that it does get better.

Maya Angelou experienced immense suffering, pain, and injustice and also demonstrated great perseverance, courage, joy, and success. For me, the way she lived her life makes her an authority on resilience, so if Ms. Angelou said that it will be better tomorrow, it’s worth believing that it will.

What are some of the most interesting or exciting projects you are working on now? How do you think that might help people?

I just opened my private virtual therapy practice in the summer of 2022, so I’m excited to be growing my network and expanding my reach. It’s my first adventure in entrepreneurship after working for group practices and the VA over the past decade.

I love working as a therapist, and the virtual platform allows me to cultivate my other passion, which is traveling with my husband and kids. It’s my vision that, through my therapy practice, I will continue to help couples and individuals grow their mental health and wellness, heal their emotional wounds, and trust their resilience so that they can experience the life they want to live.

I’m always thinking about how to blend my passions for mental health and traveling together. Right now, I’m trying to give my own kids a quality life-travel experience. I’m also trying to think of how I can help other families travel, even if it’s just for a week or two and not necessarily a lifestyle.

Traveling can be such a beautiful experience for a family, but many parts of it can feel overwhelming, too. I want to use my experience with travel to help families have amazing traveling adventures together. That’s a dream that I have in the back of my head. For now, I’m working on growing my mental health therapy practice and am excited to see how it evolves!

OK, thank you for all of that. Let’s now shift to the core focus of our interview. In this interview series we’d like to discuss travel and personal growth. Let’s dive deeper into these together. Based on your research or personal experience, why do you think travel can lead to personal growth? Can you share a story?

Travel puts us in places where we’re not the expert, and anytime we’re not the expert, that means we have something to learn, and when we learn, we grow. We are often put in situations where we need to push ourselves a little more than we would if we were at home. Travel gives us opportunities to learn about new places and people. It also gives us opportunities to learn about ourselves and how resilient and courageous we can be.

While I was on maternity leave with my first child, my husband and I took our 3-month-old and my parents to Europe for a month. While in Italy, we once found ourselves in a sweltering train car with windows that barely cracked open. I felt sticky hot and worried if my infant would be ok in the heat, but all of the other passengers did not appear alarmed at all. Spoiler alert, we all were just fine.

I walked off that train with the reinforced belief that there’s a good chance that I can handle more than I think I can. That basic belief has helped me get through both physically and mentally challenging situations since then. It is because I was traveling that I was in a situation that provided me with the opportunity to cultivate that belief and grow into a more resilient person.

Travel also puts us face to face with new people, cultures, customs, and natural landscapes. Traveling gives us the opportunity to decide if we will love and respect what is new, not just with our thoughts but with our actions. I think that whenever we make a choice to love, appreciate, and respect people and places, we grow to be better humans. There is something about experiencing it firsthand that deepens our sense of empathy in a way that is difficult to get just from looking at a picture.

Traveling with my kids has helped me grow as a mom and as a person, so I want to speak to your readers who are parents right now and say don’t be afraid to travel with your kids. Your traveling adventures do not have to be over once you have kids.

Traveling with kids has helped me see the world in a different way and has helped me grow as a more resilient, adaptable, and creative adult. I’ve seen how traveling has helped my kids grow their resilience, adaptability, curiosity, and empathy from a young age, too, because of the adventures they have been on and the exposure they’ve had to different cultures, people, animals, and places.

A recent survey from Psychology Today showed that over 80% of participants found that travel helped them with problem solving or decision making. Why do you think this is true for so many people?

I definitely think that travel helps us strengthen our skills when it comes to problem solving and decision making.

When we’re traveling, we find ourselves in situations in which we have to make decisions quickly while being in unfamiliar settings and locations. We learn how to be aware of stimuli from our environment and process it in order to make a decision that increases our chances of getting what we need and having a good time.

When we process the stimuli correctly and make a decision that leads to a favorable outcome, it’s like our brain strengthens that decision making muscle and we log patterns that helped us get what we needed so that we can apply that process the next time. When things don’t go as planned, we learn from that situation and improve and adapt so that we do things differently the next time we are faced with a similar situation.

We often hesitate in making decisions because we’re worried that we’ll make the wrong one. In most cases, if we are mindful and aware, we will not make mistakes that have catastrophic impacts. Because we have to make so many decisions in travel, we are pushed to not get too stuck on the times when we made a decision that resulted in an outcome that we didn’t love so that we can make way to have an experience that we will enjoy.

Travel gives us the practice and confidence to make decisions. The more we practice making decisions and trusting ourselves in the process, the stronger this skill will be for us.

Do you think travel enhances our mindfulness, optimism, or sense of gratitude? How? Can you please explain with an example or story?

Absolutely yes, to all of them! Travel provides us with opportunities to fill our senses with incredible beauty that, as cliche as this sounds, literally takes our breath away. Travel enhances our mindfulness as we focus on where we are in the moment to truly enjoy it. It enhances our sense of gratitude as we appreciate the opportunity to experience new things and recognize that it is a privilege to be in the space that we are in.

When we think about it, why do we travel? It’s often because we want to experience something amazing, we want to grow individually, and/or we want to create memories for ourselves or with people we love. We are literally anticipating good things. That’s optimism. With travel, something positive may be right around the corner, and we learn to not only keep our eyes open for it but begin to expect it.

Surely not everyone who travels automatically becomes an exemplar of human decency. What are a few reasons why some people completely miss out on the growth opportunities that travel can offer?

There are many reasons why some people completely miss out on growth opportunities that can be found through travel. One reason is that they focus on the negative. Inevitably, not everything will go perfectly or exactly as planned when traveling. When travelers get stuck on minor inconveniences, they miss out on opportunities to enjoy the positive elements that are also part of the travel experience.

Another thing that interferes with the growth opportunities of travel is comparing the new with the familiar, especially through lenses that see the new customs, people, architecture, language, food and experiences as inferior to what the person is familiar with.

If a person is stuck in the perspective that their way is already the best way, they won’t feel a need to learn more. When a person travels with a closed mind, especially expecting that the new place they are visiting will be inferior compared to what they already know, they miss out on the growth opportunities in front of them and are often unpleasant to be around.

Thank you for that. Now for our main question; What are your “5 Habits You Should Develop In Order to Make Travel Into An Opportunity For Personal Growth?”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_c8X7LRT3fM

1. Create your own adventure. While you may initially be drawn to a place because you saw or read something that someone else posted, dig deep and ask yourself what you want to get out of traveling. Travel for your own adventure, not to make people wish they had your life or to post the perfect picture or because someone else went there. There’s nothing wrong with getting inspiration to visit places because you learned about it from someone else, but take the time to learn about why you truly want to visit that place, then make it happen.
2. Adapt and be flexible. When my husband and I left the San Francisco Bay Area and moved our kids to Ecuador in 2019, we thought 2020 might involve a few more months in Ecuador, a few months in the US, a few months in France (we had airline tickets and an apartment for 3 months already booked), and a few months somewhere yet to be determined. We didn’t plan for international travel to be halted and that we’d stay in one country for the whole year. We would have missed out on enjoying where we were and the incredible people around us if we stayed focused on the things we couldn’t do because our plans changed. Instead of traveling internationally from Ecuador, when travel opened up again, we adapted and enjoyed domestic travel within Ecuador. This included travels to the Amazon and the Galapagos Islands. In my experience with traveling, chances are, when our first travel plans fall through, if we adapt and are flexible, we often find that what we thought was our “backup” plan was exactly what we needed.
3. Look for the good and have a positive attitude. In both travel and in life in general, what we tell ourselves about our situation has the power to make us feel better or make us feel worse. Things will not go perfectly all the time, but if you expect to find the good, you will find it. Let a positive attitude, which goes hand and hand with gratitude, be your foundation. This doesn’t mean that you will feel ok all the time, but when you approach the situation with a grateful and positive attitude looking for how it can help you grow and what good can come out of it, you will have more peace and clarity that will help you navigate what you need to do to help you feel good again.
4. Commit to learning new things. Whether it’s learning a new phrase or something about yourself, commit to not only having an open mind but also to pursuing knowledge and experiences that will help you grow your understanding of yourself and the world you’re exploring. I believe that just believing that we’re capable of learning gives us a certain level of courage to grow. Pursuing opportunities to learn about ourselves and the world around us helps us keep an open mind for us to really enjoy the beauty that is right in front of us that we would have missed if our mind was closed.
5. Maintain a connection with the people in your network who are uplifting and encouraging, including people from back home. This does not mean only talking with the people you already know and not interacting with anyone new in your local area. Sometimes, simply remembering that we have people who believe in us as we grow and adventure is the connection that we need to help us get through the rough patches of travel. Even the most amazing adventure can feel lonely at times, and I think that knowing that we have people who love us gives us the courage and confidence to push ourselves to keep going, look for the good, and try new things.

From your experience, does travel have a negative impact on personal growth too? Is there a downside to travel?

I think that people sometimes use travel as a way to escape their reality or run away from their problems. Traveling for those reasons can feel fun at first but might not immediately help us grow into better human beings. I wouldn’t say that all hope for growth is lost if people travel for those reasons, though. Maybe I’m overly optimistic, but I believe that transformative experiences can happen even when we’re not seeking them out, especially while traveling.

One thing we don’t think about much is culture shock and our body’s natural trauma response that can kick in when we feel unsafe. Being in a new environment where we don’t speak the language, might not be sleeping or eating optimally, aren’t accessing our established support network as easily, and have to make fast-paced decisions can strain our sense of emotional balance. This can happen even when we are traveling with the most open and optimistic mind.

Challenging travel environments may cause travelers to become overstimulated beyond the window where personal growth happens. This could cause a traveler to experience immediate discomfort as well as feel self-critical and discouraged from future travel. People have different comfort zones when it comes to travel. We need to practice self-compassion and be aware of our own comfort zones so that we can stretch ourselves to grow in a healthy way . If not, we may not only find ourselves experiencing intense, uncomfortable emotions but also feel discouraged and give up on finding the pace and style of travel that truly will help us grow. That doubt in ourselves could negatively impact personal growth, but self-doubt is preventable and repairable!

We are very blessed that some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US, whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we both tag them :-)

I would love to chat with Gordon Ramsay. My family is currently streaming his Uncharted series, and we’re all captivated by his global culinary adventures. I’m amazed at the way he demonstrates genuine curiosity and eagerness to learn from other chefs even with his own expertise. I think that his self-awareness, entrepreneurial and mentoring mind, and love for his family would make him an amazing person to have breakfast or lunch with. Plus, having a bunch of kids myself, it’s fun when I get to connect with other parents who have big families.

How can our readers further follow your work online?

Come visit my website www.therapywithlarissahouse.com. My email address and phone number are listed there. Even if you’re not looking to do therapy with me, I love chatting about wellness and travel, especially if you want to chat about traveling with kids!

Instagram: @thejourneying_therapist

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/larissa-house-lcsw

Thank you for these really excellent insights, and we greatly appreciate the time you spent with this. We wish you continued success.

Thank you so much for this interview! I wish you and your readers many incredible adventures as we grow to be better human beings.

About The Interviewer: Maria Angelova, MBA is a disruptor, author, motivational speaker, body-mind expert, Pilates teacher and founder and CEO of Rebellious Intl. As a disruptor, Maria is on a mission to change the face of the wellness industry by shifting the self-care mindset for consumers and providers alike. As a mind-body coach, Maria’s superpower is alignment which helps clients create a strong body and a calm mind so they can live a life of freedom, happiness and fulfillment. Prior to founding Rebellious Intl, Maria was a Finance Director and a professional with 17+ years of progressive corporate experience in the Telecommunications, Finance, and Insurance industries. Born in Bulgaria, Maria moved to the United States in 1992. She graduated summa cum laude from both Georgia State University (MBA, Finance) and the University of Georgia (BBA, Finance). Maria’s favorite job is being a mom. Maria enjoys learning, coaching, creating authentic connections, working out, Latin dancing, traveling, and spending time with her tribe. To contact Maria, email her at angelova@rebellious-intl.com. To schedule a free consultation, click here.