Since Susan Boyle came out as having Asperger syndrome, then not long after that actor Dan Ackroyd did the same thing. I have been to a few Asperger awarenesss meetings and some post diagnosis groups, one of the topics was disclosure. If and when we should be telling anyone about our diagnosis, When is the right time, best time etc.

At work over the last couple of days I have had two separate incidents where mothers of children who have ASD or Aspergers whatever you want to call it have openly announced to me and everyone else in the store that her child has the condition. The first was because her child likes to get under the counter, which many children do and she decides to tell everyone as if to make anexcuse for him. The second was a woman who was buying a PC game for her son and said that she had to get one that was compatible because her son had Aspergers and he would get moody if it was wrong. When she could have just asked if it was compatible because who would want one that wasn’t.

It’s like these women had to announce this to everyone as an excuse or as someone to get special treatment from whoever they told. Many children in this area seem to be getting a diagnosis which is good and I hope those who get need the help get the help. Telling every man and his dog about it is not right. Parents should be educated on how to deal with this and who to tell, fair enough if the child needs special treatment in school, then tell the right people. Don’t just feel like this is an excuse because you don’t know how to control your child, Aspergers or ASD the child needs boundaries and needs to know the rules to some degree. I didn’t get diagnosed when I was younger, I only found out when I was twenty six. I was raised like every other child and admittedly this does have it’s pros and cons.

I look at what I have achieved by not being pandered to. I have a degree in writing. Various degrees from college and despite the fact that I have a severe social disability I have managed to deal with presentations, interviews and have worked several jobs in retail. Which I discovered is one of the worst places for someone with ASD to be working. I am sensitive to certain lighting, certain sounds and dealing with people I don’t know asking me questions. I cope and have done so since I was eighteen. Getting the diagnosis has been a long process of research where I have been learning all about what is best for me and what is not. The bad side of late diagnosis is the constant trouble I was in with family and schools because of my behavior and lack of compassion or empathy towards others. I have no idea what my strengths and weaknesses are and because of this I have never known what work and what things would be best for me. My lack of interest in sport, hobbies etc meant that I was forced to do things that weren’t right for me and repeatedly had to take part in activities that did more harm than good. I have constantly failed interviews and it would be rare for me to pass one because I am not getting the support I need, the level of degree I got was not ideal because I have issues with concentration and absorbing information. I needed an assistant.

The list is endless, as you can tell my spelling and grammar is not the best for the same reasons. However look at Susan Boyle and Dan Ackroyd they have both done well and there are loads of famous and successful people out there with ASD, that have never been diagnosed or where diagnosed late. Obviously there are probably not that many people that where diagnosed as a child that have grown into an adult yet, so I guess there is no proof of what they will achieve. My point it telling someone you have it shouldn’t be disclosed unless you have to, unless it is necessary. It should be down to someone with the condition to decide who they tell. Treating us different and patronizing us because we are different is not the right way in many ways we are the same.

I don’t know there has to be a happy medium.

This is a picture of a card I have, its from the NAS website it is handy in a crisis or a meltdown, when you can’t get your words together.