Being religious has kept me from going insane
This is how religion has helped me stay sane even in the worst of times.
I was 10 years old and was riding in our Army Gypsy with my mom to school. I think I had my first annual exam that day and I was nervous, extremely nervous. That’s me actually, I was an anxious kid from the start, I worry too much, overthink every possibility, and let my thoughts take a shot at me.
I turned to my mom and she knew by the look on my face that I was thinking of the exam. She said, “Don’t worry, it’ll be fine.”
I tried to ignore the constant buzzing sound in my head and tried to concentrate on other things. I looked outside the window, but the scenery of the Cantonment couldn’t hold my attention. However, as I was trying to find something to look at, I started to hear a sound, different than the anxious buzzing, a soothing lyrical sound. I found myself breathing evenly after some time and playing the rhythm of the song in my head in tune with the cassette (Ah, cassettes!) being played. I felt calm, I felt hopeful, I felt unafraid.
The song ended and then I asked my mom, “What was that song? It was a bhajan (devotional song), right?”
My mom said, “That was Hanuman Chalisa. It’s a hymn praising Lord Hanuman and it is believed that whoever recites these 40 verses daily becomes fearless over time.”
To which I said, “Really? That means if I recite Hanuman Chalisa from now on, I wouldn’t ever be afraid?”
My mom said, “Yes, sweetheart.”
Okay, I didn’t start reciting Hanuman Chalisa the next day. Actually, I didn’t start reciting it till I was 13 years old. Initially, I’d do it only on Tuesdays, as most Indians would know, is a day designated for Lord Hanuman’s worship. After a few months, I started to do this daily, before leaving for school, early in the morning. I then did it before leaving for college and now, it’s still a ritual and I do it every day before starting my day at the office.
Over the years, I’ve been mocked, taunted, and sometimes, appreciated for being religious. Yes, I still call myself religious, because I don’t think I’ve reached that exalted state of being to be called spiritual. Doesn’t mean I’m not trying.
But being religious has saved me from going under multiple times and it is one of the reasons I’m able to call myself a stable person because God knows I have some crazy habits!
So, here are a few reasons why I think being religious has made me a better version of myself.
1. It has helped me curb my anxiety and stay calm in the face of adversity
As I said, I was an anxious person even as a kid. Put me in an unfamiliar situation, and see my nerves do their work on me. I get worried over anything to which I don’t know the outcome or I simply can’t control it. Sometimes, people see it, and sometimes they don’t. But more often than not, I fret over the most trivial of issues in my life. My solution to this problem is to either chant a hymn or a mantra like the Hanuman Chalisa or maybe listen to them. First, it takes my mind off of whatever it is that was making me nervous and then, it helps me gather myself and think clearly towards a solution.
2. It has made me disciplined
Being traditional in the way you worship God, comes with its set of dos and don’ts. In the Hindu religion, being a non-vegetarian doesn’t exactly work in your favor (which I am, by the way). Now, this might sound weird or amusing to you, but I’m only allowed to eat non-veg only a certain set of days in a week, the same goes for drinking alcohol. The upside to this is that I never have to worry about balancing my diet and I have learned to not be swayed by friends or society in this matter. Also, since I have to do my ‘puja’ before 12 PM every day, I clearly have to take a bath and get ready for the day. See, I can’t be a lazy bum!
3. It makes me extremely grateful and doesn’t let anything get to my head
This has probably to do more with my mom than me being religious. Whenever anything good happens to anyone in the family, my mom always says, “It’s not you, it’s God.” And I believe this to the core because I’m well aware of the fact that I’ve gotten many things in my life which I didn’t deserve or somebody else deserved it the same, yet only I got it. This thought process makes me stay humble and be thankful to God and to the people around me who help me in all my endeavours.
4. It makes me generous
It’s probably not the best reason, but any Hindu festivity or ‘puja’ calls for a ‘daan’ (the act of giving or charity) and me and my family follow this tradition to the core. My parents believe in honoring the priest by giving to him generously and also distributing the ‘prasad’ (offering to God) amongst all our neighbors and people who work for us in any capacity, whether it be the society guards or the cleaning staff in our building or just some random ‘rickshaw wala’ on the road.
5. It gives me the courage to keep my faith
Lastly, being religious makes me have faith. Faith in something bigger than me, faith in a positive outcome, faith to keep doing what I do, and leave the rest to God. Keeping the faith is one thing, but daring to have faith is another. Because believing in something that has no evidence, that has no footing in the present, that I can’t see happening in the future, takes a hell lot of courage.
