Winter Love And Why I Can’t Write Anymore
I’ve been thinking about it a long time and I always say this to mumma- how much I love winters now. I love the coziness of the season, I love the winter aesthetics and especially I love nature’s cycle of change. I love seeing the seasons change. I love the fact that nature reminds us to change with the seasons. I used to fret over my laziness during winters. I used to worry and get anxious as to why I couldn’t wake up early in the morning, why I didn’t want to do a lot, why I didn’t want to go out and socialize much, why I just wanted a cup of hot chocolate with a good book and spend my evenings that way.
When I was a kid, I used to hate winters. Obviously, because I can’t bear the cold. I still can’t but now I appreciate it more because we have only 2 months of it in North India. Sometime back, I watched a YouTube video of a lady who lives in the North of Sweden and she said that the way to have a peaceful and happy winter season is to go along with it. I don’t remember her exact words but it was something about not fighting the flow of nature, your life will become so much easier if you don’t resist the changes nature brings with it. So, if you feel like winter makes you lazy and you feel cold and don’t want to do anything, then slow down. Maybe take a cue from nature that it’s time for you also to take a break from things and just relax. There’s beauty in stillness. There’s calm in the silence.
Speaking of beauty, I am also loving the process of taking care of my skin again. During winters, my skin becomes a bit dry which makes me realize that I need a lot of hydration. Also, it feels nice to take some time out and have a 3–4 step skincare routine. During summers, I usually skip everything and just wear sunscreen because I don’t feel like slathering on too much.
All in all, I think I didn’t have a lot to write about because I didn’t have time to think much. With the COVID days long gone, I had to go to the office quite frequently and also go out more for socializing. I love how weird friendships tend to work so beautifully sometimes. I can’t believe that the silliest things I tell to these days is a close work friend, who’s a married guy with 2 kids. I know he didn’t understand how big of a problem it was for me when I said I couldn’t write anymore, but even then he listened to me and said that that’s exactly what I should write about.
Which brings me here….my first story in almost a year. I’m not entirely sure why I can’t write anymore but I do know that every time I think of writing something, I either get lazy and put it off for the next day or have second thoughts about writing it. The best part about Covid was that I didn’t have to meet anybody and that gave me the freedom to not be bothered about other people’s judgements. Like how much importance could you possibly give to somebody else’s opinion when you just talk on the phone or interact via social media right? But when you see people in person, you’re dreaded with the thought of meeting them the next day and realizing they read your story and now they either like you or downright hate you.
I’m not saying that all of my stories are based off of real people, in fact, that is seldom the case. But I do like to give anecdotes of things I see in my surroundings because I like the storytelling process of letting others know how I even had an idea in the first place. It could be born out of a conversation between me and that person or me just observing their life as a third person.
Another thing I have come to realize is the more extroverted I become in reality, the more introverted I want to be in my head. Does that even make sense?
I guess what I’m trying to say is that the more outdoorsy things I get to do in my day-to-day life, the less I want to share about it. I like dressing up and going to parties and weddings but I don’t like to take a photograph. A year ago, I used to think that when I would clear my Grade 1 Piano exam, I’d post it on Instagram. You know, considering that it was a milestone for me. It’s been more than 3 months since my result came out and only my family knows about it.
I’m not sure when I’ll be posting again, I just know that I am a person who writes only when they’re in the right head space. I hope this year, I’ll be able to write more and be more consistent with it. Until next time!
