Accepting This Simple Yet Bitter Truth Has Helped Me Outlast Obstacles Far Bigger Than Me

I wish I could turn back time and share it with my 17-year-old self.

Anirban Kar
Awakened Millennial
6 min readMar 16, 2022


Photo by Estoymhrb from Pexels

Let’s start this off with a simple question. What do you do when things don’t go as per your plan? What do you do when you lose the round despite giving it your best?

What’s your first reaction?

Is it anxiety, anger, desperation, or disappointment?

Here comes the next one. Why do you feel all these negative emotions? Because they are all but natural responses.

Fair enough.

But then why do you carry them around your shoulder long after the event has concluded?

It’s because, in some way, you feel responsible. You think you could have done more to control the outcome. So you blame yourself.

Let me be as clear as I can be.

Not only (in most cases) do you not deserve the outcomes you think you do, but you have no control over anything beyond your actions, no matter how good you are.

No. Cheering you up isn’t my priority here. It’s all about calling things for what they are, so you can focus on what matters.

Life Isn’t Fair & It’s Okay. Now, Let’s Get Over It.

“You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”
Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

You can dedicate years to preparing yourself for a sporting event. But there can be numbers of candidates who have had more suitable training, wiser coach, the luck factor, or are just plain better than you.

And even if you indeed are leagues above your closest opponent. But you have no say over if the event gets canceled because of a pandemic or war.

So what do you do? Stop training? Give up without a fight?


Most people end up ruining their lives because when they don’t get the things they think they should’ve, they start throwing



Anirban Kar
Awakened Millennial

Indian blogger. Words in Mind Cafe, Start Up, & Better Humans. Support me by getting a Membership here: