Who you calling a “Step-parent”?
Imagine this:
For 15 years you work a job. A durable and dependable worker. Not a lot of call ins, always on time and you have learned the system inside out. Don’t get me wrong, you have had your ups and downs but you are considered cream of the crop. Low and behold a position becomes available as Unit Supervisor. You talk it over with management and they have persuaded you to apply. Thinking you have a slim chance at being awarded this position you take a leap of faith and apply. You spend every waking moment practicing for the interview and by golly you give the best damn interview yet. Would you believe that you get the position! Only one thing, your title isn’t unit supervisor, it’s conditional unit supervisor. What does that mean? Doesn’t it leave a bad taste in your mouth? Do you feel like somehow you are not fully in your position. I bet you will do all of the work as you are. This feeling you feel right now it’s the same way I feel about being called a “Step-father”. That title is almost screaming you are not a truly an actual father, rather you are a stand in. Although, there are many situations in blended families. “Step Father” is a hurtful to a parent who had stepped in.
I heard a man once say perception is reality so we must address the other view points of step parents.
Mentioned above we spoke of a dedicated parent who steps in without hesitation but there are also situations where the step in parent might not be so dedicated. Even though there is a very thin line between parent cruelty and tough love not all step ins have the best intentions. Parents have the most impact on a child’s life as a whole. A persons childhood lay foundations for many things to come in that persons life. These influences can either push, motivate and drive or they can tear, deteriorate and cause life long strongholds.
The point of view really sets the how one views parents and parents that step in for the biological. Those that step in with the best intentions out of love and those that are not there by choice and put in a position because the person they love. Nonetheless the influences of these roles affects a persons life whether positive or negative forever.
Perspective by: Michael Simple
Curated by: Awesome Black Dads
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