The Matryoshka-Doll effect

Are we all familiar with matryoshka dolls? You know, these Russian, wooden dolls that look like a nesting grandmother? That set of dolls of decreasing size place in one another? Yes, I’m referring to the “matryoshka dolls”, or the so-called “babushkas”.

A couple of years back, I realised that their purpose of existence is not only for entertainment, but also, for psychology and therapy. I bet you have wondered why you fight with people, or have no idea why they “explode” sometimes, blowing up everything that’s ever been built during the process of making a human relationship concrete.

Think of you and a person with whom you’ve had a fight with recently about a serious matter. Then imagine the two of you, as two matryoshka dolls. The biggest dolls, are you and the person you’ve thought of. The other, smaller dolls inside you, are your problems and fears.

Take the two smallest dolls, and give them a name of a problem, one different problem each. The next doll that comes in bigger size is a small result of the problem in the previous babushka. So on and so forth, you have created a “net” of problems existing in both dolls, building up to become the doll you are yourselves. Do you get the point?

Let’s make some things a bit clearer in order to avoid any kind of misunderstanding. Each fight, fear, problem, relationship, etc. is a result of other, tiny factors that contribute to form the person we have become today. In this case, each of your concerns is a matryoshka doll. You and your partner have some issues inside your head that have led you to argue with each other, doubt each other.

But if there is one thing that can hold true for sure, is that, imagining you and the people around you as babushka dolls, you can understand why they indicate such behaviours, what made them become stone-hearted, why they act the way they do. With the help of a matryoshka doll, you can learn the art of forgiving, and if you cannot forgive someone, you can at least comprehend their situation, your situation, so as to move forward.

How the “matryoshka doll effect” help me? Since the day I was introduced to this manner of handling people and relationships, I excused so many people for what they have done, I even forgave myself for things I would regret, otherwise, forever. We are all matryoshka dolls. We just need someone to help us “open up”. Be that person yourself.

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