12 Things I Thought Were Sins as a Kid (That Definitely Aren’t)

How purity culture, fear, and shame shaped my view of God

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I still remember the first time I said “crap” out loud. I was nine, walking through the church car park after Sunday School, when I dropped my Bible and let it slip.

My friend gasped like I’d just kicked the baby Jesus.

I froze, half expecting a lightning bolt or a pastor to step out from behind a bush and revoke my salvation on the spot. When nothing happened, I did what any good church kid would do: I went home and repented — just in case.

That pretty much sums up the theology I grew up with: God was always watching, mostly to make sure I wasn’t having too much fun or using questionable language within a five-mile radius of the sanctuary.

Sure, there were the big sins.

But then there was this whole other category of cultural Christian “sins” — things no one could quite prove were in the Bible, but everyone knew were wrong. Or at least felt wrong. Because we were told they were.

Growing up in church, sin wasn’t just something you did. It was something you almost did. Thought about doing. Accidentally enjoyed. There were the usual Ten Commandments, of course, but then there was the Extended…