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The Sermon That Gave Me Nightmares And The Truth That Set Me Free
How I Unlearned the Fear of God
I was barely old enough to tie my own shoes when they first asked me how I’d convince God not to send me to hell.
I still remember the sermon.
Red-faced, sweating under the stage lights, the preacher pounded the pulpit like a judge delivering a sentence. His voice boomed through the sanctuary, rattling in my 6-year-old chest.
“One day, you will stand before God, and He will ask you, ‘Why should I let you into My heaven?’”
He let the words hang in the air, scanning the pews.
“What will you say?”
I shrank into my seat, my stomach twisting. He wasn’t just asking some hypothetical question. I was sure he was talking about me. About the moment I would die and come face to face with God’s holy wrath.
And what if I said the wrong thing? What if I hesitated? What if I thought I was saved, but I wasn’t?
I didn’t hear much after that. My heart pounded in my ears. I sat there, a child, drowning in the fear that one day I’d stand before God, open my mouth to speak — and be cast away forever.