BAD ART → Makeup, Art You Put On Your Face
From the BAD ART Newsletter by Betsy Streeter.
My favorite Star Trek character is of course Spock. When I was a kid, I noticed that he seemed to be wearing blue eyeshadow. I didn’t have any idea why — one theory I had was because it matched his blue shirt. Like how one of my friends wore green eyeshadow to match her bright green Dittos jeans.
My favorite episode of the TV show What Not To Wear features a woman named Denise. Denise is a flight attendant with peroxide hair and permanent duckface and so much stuff on her eyes she looks like she’s wearing matching caterpillars. This, to her, is normal. It’s her “real” face. They have to peel it all off to find out what she even looks like.
And then when they find her actual face, she doesn’t like it, because to her, that’s not her at all.
Makeup is such a huge part of human history it’s hard to know where to start. Cleopatra? Frankenstein? Phantom of the Opera? Queen Elizabeth I?
Makeup is used to make ourselves look appealing, to terrify, to fake people out, cover flaws, create characters, celebrate Halloween, look totally normal, appear as our true selves. Our faces are an art project and it’s been that way since the first time somebody made ritual marks or hurled some mud.
There’s this thing called the “beauty market” made up of multinational corporations. Stuff to smear, blot, and brush on our faces takes up aisle after aisle at the drugstore.
How many people in the world who say they can’t draw, have gotten up every morning for years and drawn on their own faces with pencils and brushes and sponges and stuff?
Maybe you do that?
Or maybe you go to sporting events and take them Very Very Seriously? Like these excellent people? I mean, it only took me like fifteen minutes watching an NFL game to catch all these. FANTASTIC.
Okay the one person in that group might be wearing a mask but you have GOT to admire the commitment. Have you ever worn a full-face mask for any period of time? I have this slug mask and I tell you, after about ten minutes I’ve gotta have some AIR. So bully for him or her.
There’s a kid named Jack who has an Instagram called @makeuupbyjack (note the extra u) in which he transforms himself in incredible ways. The kid is an artist, no doubt. Really something.
And then there’s the whole idea of “natural” makeup, which isn’t supposed to look like it is there. Presented in photos that require an hour of prep, a lighting crew and special lenses. So (not) fresh, (not) sun kissed and (not) natural.
But I love when people express themselves. So hey, if matching your eyeshadow to your bright green pants does it for you, have at it. Or maybe you just take your face exactly as it is. Or grow a beard. Whatever makes you, you.
May you find just the right shade of lipstick, may the good news be yours, won’t you be my neighbor?
— Betsy
PS Okay wait I found one more
Oh and one more, an old favorite. In a crowd full of footy fans, be a chicken. And/or whatever their friend the squirrel deer badger thing is.
Okay I’ll stop now.
Betsy Streeter writes about art. Get her newsletter, BAD ART.
