lil Yachty Tastes Awful, and He Works
Bad rappers are now very good at hip hop. Here’s why.
lil Yachty is a bucket bro, I don’t mess with him — Matt Amha
Bro, what happened to real rappers bro. Fruity ass, colored dread autotuned fools. Them kids look like they never seen a brass knuckle. ← A bunch of comments I read on WorldStarHipHop combined to create the ultimate Crusty Uncle opinion on today’s up and coming rappers.
Look, old people, the internet happened. Hip hop traded carpenter jeans and timbs for trap remixes of the Rugrats theme song and xanax.
lil Yachty is a by-product of the weirdness that is no longer from left field. He’s a base run hit in a world fueled by memes and split-toned Instagram pictures of knives arranged just so on bedroom model’s bums.
Yachty just released a video with theFADER explaining his origins to the world. I’d hesitate to call a mockumentary. He talks about how white kids at university would make fun of his red hair. How he was miserable, that he always knew he wanted to be famous and make millions.
On some level, isn’t that how we all feel? Not everybody has Ferrari red hair, not everybody sings like a breathy 11-year-old. Yet at some point in life, everyone has been an outsider. That’s a core value of Boat’s brand, and he knows it.
Charisma is evasive and difficult to manufacture. It’s why some rappers always wear sunglasses in their interviews, and others mumble about their Gucci belt. It’s all about crafting an image.
Everything you’ve seen or heard of him is intentional. Those fuzzy pics of his greasy mug? His dad took those. Those lo-fi beats and clunky bars? Listen again, those weren’t just tracked onto a copy-pasted Ultrabeat loop from Boi-1da forums. Those were crafted by Burberry Perry. They were fine-tuned by all his friends during actual garage studio recording sessions.
I have no problem listening to a meal-mouthed teenager moan over wacky beats. That’s because whether he meant to or not, Yachty is the breaking wave in hip hop. Safe is boring. Look at the mixed reaction to Views for reference. Drug rap is on the way out if the popularity of projects Coloring Book is anything to go by. It’s time for the hooligans of hip hop to rebrand.
Tyler, the Creator is a great comparable to lil Boat (this guy needs more aliases: One-Eight Footer?) That’s because he had a similar rise to prominence:
- Be that kid everybody makes fun of in school. This is the first sign you’re meant for something more than a degree in undeclared arts studies.
- Stumble upon friends as eccentric and polarizing as you are. Commit these people to the cause.
- Annoy loud-mouthed, washed up New York rappers and hard-nosed music critics alike with your terrible music until white kids find it, promote it, and then pay to see your concerts.
- Profit.
lil Yachty as an idea is perfect, and I love him. He does exactly what it says on the tin: whatever the fuck he wants.
Click the ♥️ if you believe hennything is possible.
Here are some more cotton candy headass rappers to keep your day bouncing.
Ugly God — Personal favorite: “Bernie Sanders”
I’ll never look at a pinecone the same way.
Zeus Trappin — Personal Favorite: “Practice”
This is a guy who called his EP “Mumbo Sauce” and defines it as “trap rock.” Go for it.
