Ask An Astronaut Whose Tether Has Separated From the Service Module

When did you first realize you wanted to be an astronaut?

When I was 10 my dad took me to the Smithsonian Air & Space Museum in Washington, DC and showed me the Apollo 11 exhibit. He told me how it went to the moon and came back, and I remember thinking that I wanted to go to space some day. But I wanted to come back from space, and that’s something that’s going to be hard to do because my tether has separated from the service module.

What advice would you give to an aspiring astronaut?

Obviously study in school! NASA and Space X draw largely from people in the STEM careers — OH GOD — which is Science, Technology, Engineering and Math. Take a look at the careers of astronauts you admire and see what path they took to get there. Just don’t follow the path if it leads you to a faulty tether that detaches from the hook holding you to the service module because oh my god.

What do you like most about being an astronaut?

What’s not to love? Aside from losing your connection to the service module, and drifting away, every day is exciting. You’re part of a very small family of individuals who’ve broken free from the bonds of Earth’s gravity and floated above it. So many experiences that you can’t have on Earth! Weightlessness, obviously. And I see a new sunrise every 90 minutes! Right now I’m circling the Earth faster than any plane currently flying. And I will continue to do so for eternity because some imbecile at quality control dropped the ball when he inspected this tether.

Is being an astronaut ever scary?

There was a time during one mission when we lost power for an hour or so so it was very dark on board. That wasn’t as scary as much as alarming. But we worked it out. You have to realize, we’re highly trained. We’re always focused on completing our tasks, so there’s not a lot of time to worry. Today, I was completely engaged in replacing a module attached to our solar array, so I wasn’t thinking about anything but that. Now I’m thinking I have an hour of oxygen so I should probably stop talking and focus on my current situation.

What would you tell someone who thinks “Oh, I could never be an astronaut?”

I’d say that if you really want something, you just have to work at it as hard as you can. Set your goals and work to achieve them. Never say never. I kept telling myself I would be an astronaut. I worked hard and studied hard, and one day I was! Please tell Barbara I love her even though I know she was banging Jacob. Oh my god. Oh my god. I just put two and two together. He’s the quality control guy for the tethers.