James Dolan Apologizes to Oakley, Signs him to 3 year, $15 Million Contract

The Stuff of Nightmares for Knicks fans

NEW YORK — Owner James Dolan formally apologized to Charles Oakley and Knicks fans following an embarrassing situation which saw the fan favorite ejected from Madison Square Garden and banned for life following a confrontation with area security.

“It was a total misunderstanding and I want to apology to anyone who was irked by the situation.” He went on to say that he has attempted to both rectify the situation and shore up the Knicks depth by signing the 53 year old power forward to a 3 year deal.

“Our season has not gone the way we hoped and I figured it was because we need more depth in our front court. I think Oak can come in and give us 10–15 minutes strong minutes a game.” When questioned whether it was precisely this type of decision making that has hindered the franchise, Dolan expressed disbelief that anyone viewed his management decisions negatively. “Everyone loves all of the moves made under my regime, from signing Jerome James, to hiring Isiah Thomas. None of our poor seasons have to do with any of my decisions over the past 17 years.”