Trillion Dollar Coach… outstanding guide for those who guide others
This post is a teaser for why you should read the book Trillion Dollar Coach wholeheartedly
a bit about me
I am what you might call a renaissance man in software engineering, as I can do some of backend engineering and some of infrastructure engineering and always try to “be like water” but what fascinates me most is the skill of human interaction and guiding people to perform at their optimum best.
When platform-engineering formed in re-org, I became part of it as a coach. After hearing the news, I eagerly started skimming through the internet and luckily found Trillion Dollar Coach. This blog can not do justice to this amazing book about and commemorate the magnificent coach Bill Campbell… who mentored leaders like Steve Jobs, Sundar Pichai, Jonathan Rosenberg (writer of the book) to name a few. So consider this as a teaser why you should read the actual book wholeheartedly.
who is coach?
Coaches roll up their sleeves and get their hands dirty. They don’t just believe in our potential; they get in the arena to help us realize our potential. They hold up a mirror so we can see our blind spots and they hold us accountable for working through our sore spots. They take responsibility for making us better without taking credit for our accomplishments.
Being selfless, brutally honest, a beacon of inspiration and ensuring you love your colleagues and means best for them are key elements of making a brilliant coach. We will discuss each of the attribute below with more detail.
friendship and warmth
He was always available to chat with friends, neighbors, colleagues, fellow parents from his kids’ school; he’d give them a hug, listen to whatever was going on, and usually spin some story that helped them gain some perspective, draw some insight, or make a decision.
Genuinely love and care about your colleagues, be sincere. This will help you build a rapport that you mean best. Don’t afraid to be a class clown… have fun. So when you have to be critical to them, they know it’s coming from a good place.
listening as a skill
“We’d all be a lot wiser if we listened more,” Wooden said, “not just hearing the words, but listening and not thinking about what we’re going to say.”
a 2011 study from the Ashridge Business School in the United Kingdom ranks “encouragement” as the third-most-appreciated quality in a coach, behind only listening and understanding.
I am too guilty to cut off, thinking about what I will say next. If we keep doing this, people will stop coming up to discuss and communicate as the feeling of discouragement will increase and mentees think “well what's the point?”. So work on active listening consciously. Just like any other skill, it will take time, but soon you will comprehend it. Another critical skill for coaches is to tell stories. Never tell colleagues directly what to do. Plant a seed, navigate them to reach to destination on their own. You navigating and they steering the wheel will be a joyous journey which they will cherish even after they reached to destination. Muscles they will use in journey will help them next time they ponder for new destinations.
coach coaches in moment
“When I’m really annoyed or frustrated with what someone is doing,” she says, “I step back and force myself to think about what they are doing well and what their value is. You can always find something. If we’re in public, I’ll praise them on that. I’ll give constructive feedback as soon as I can, but only when the person is feeling safe. Once they are feeling safe and supported, then I’ll say ‘by the way’ and provide the feedback. I got this from Bill. He would always do this in a supportive way.”
Often we found ourselves in a conundrum to shoot at the moment or wait till performance cycle and 1:1s. Finding the happy medium is essential. Exercise of thinking about value person adds and what they do best will really help you focus on understanding the colleague better and you can deliver critical feedback with precision without being judgemental.
beacon of encouragement
Courage is hard. People are naturally afraid of taking risks for fear of failure. It’s the manager’s job to push them past their reticence. Shona Brown, a longtime Google executive, calls it being an “evangelist for courage.” As a coach, Bill was a never-ending evangelist for courage. As Bill Gurley notes, he “blew confidence in people.” He believed you could do things, even when you yourself weren’t so sure, always pushing you to go beyond your selfimposed limits.
Having a self doubt, getting worried about, thinking x does y better than you is perfectly normal. It shows you care. We often take simple route not because we are lazy but more because we want immediate progress. Coaches can boast confidence back you up to take risks dare them to go where they are most afraid to go. This will not only raise quality of work but also help your mentees to do something remarkable by conquering their inner demons.
manage the aberrant genius
aberrant geniuses — high-performing but difficult team members — should be tolerated and even protected, as long as their behavior isn’t unethical or abusive and their value outweighs the toll their behavior takes on management, colleagues, and teams.
We all know “that” person might be you/I am this person who takes pride in what he does. Adds massive value but not play very well with others. Even in failure, not shy away from saying “hah! told you so…” Trillion Dollar Coach teaches us to work very hard with them after all, they are valuable asset so try to protect them polish them to be a leader help them understand how to play with others. Imagine a genius who is leader too? rare combination to have for any org. However, you might not always be successful gauge if you are putting all efforts in them and still facing defiance, let them go. Nothing is important then culture and org health.
don't worry about upper echelon
One day, Jonathan spent part of his 1:1 with Bill talking about how he wasn’t getting any feedback from the founders on his work. What do they want? he wondered. Bill’s response was that Jonathan should not worry about top-down feedback; rather, he should pay attention to input from his peers. What do your teammates think of you? That’s what’s important!
Who doesn't like recognition from founders and directors? But if worry about too much, we ignore those who are with you every day… your peers. What they think of you matters the most. They know you up close and the “real” you feedback they can provide can not compare to any other because usually what founders and directors see is your persona, not a real you. Just like your family knows you better than anyone outside and you should only care what they have to say as they mean best.
1:1 framework
I have been using Bill’s framework for 1:1s and it really helped in keeping these meetups focused, formatted and goal oriented with both senior and junior colleagues.
Summary
Coach has to be selfless.
Take extra effort in making good relationships with colleagues. Try to match frequency and get synced with each individual. Pressure and anger are normal, so when next time it happens, will you take a step back force yourself to think what colleague is doing well? Pay extra attention to those who are difficult to work with, but add values. Guide mentees to respect and care about peers and not concern about upward feedback. I hope you find this article just as insightful to encourage you to go through the actual book.
