He is the doctor to whom you don’t have to ask too much, goes and comes back from his office and suddenly says to me «Sit down on the cot and remove the underpants, I’ll make you some small stings, then I’ll insert the needles and I will let you rest for about ten minutes, are you taking any medications?»
Is the first time I have seen it, it was recommended to me by a good sonographer who found me a pubalgia and it is also the first time that I have undergone acupuncture.
I wait a while before answering his last question, then I answer «Yes, I take the statins for cholesterol, a supplement to reduce the volume of the prostate and…», but then I stop myself waiting for a signal.
He looks at me curiously and then urges me to continue «Please go on…»
«I also take Viagra because I have a slight erectile dysfunction…»
His beard reaches out to my left ear and he hisses at me «Humm, you don’t look elderly, anyway, it’s good, I also use it and sometimes I take eight oz»
I remain astonished and I reply «But the maximum dose is four oz and the leaflet says do not exceed the maximum daily dose»
At that point it crushes my pubis making me jump from pain, then seraphic replies «I tried three oz and it didn’t make any effect, even the four oz didn’t make me much so I took eight oz and the effect was amazing»
I look at him dumbfounded «But doesn’t it hurt?» And he replies «No it doesn’t hurt, are all those extra efforts that hurt… let’s say that every two days is the right timeframe to take it»
«So, do you take it every two days?»
He approaches the door and answers «I give it every two days… making sex is good, life is too short and must be lived intensely», then he goes out closing the door.
I rest on the cot for about ten minutes thinking he is a strange doctor.
He returns after fifteen minutes, asks me how it goes, and removes the needles, then he says «See you in a week, let’s agree with my secretary for the timing». He ends the visit with a wink «Nowadays there is a less invasive and more powerful drug, next time I will give you the prescription for this new one»
He washes his hands, shakes mine, and leaves. The pubalgia seems to have disappeared, those ten minutes of acupuncture were enough to make me pass the pain thinking that I too should… give it every two days.
