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I’m so Tired of Being Bipolar that Maybe I’m no Longer Bipolar
Once bipolar, always bipolar?
Every Wednesday, I fill my weekly pill container. I didn’t need a container when I began down this path. I had an antidepressant, a mood stabilizer, and an antipsychotic. One pill in the morning and three at bedtime. It was pretty easy.
The first time in inpatient rehab for an addiction to cocaine and alcoholism, I was diagnosed as having bipolar disorder. I wasn’t taking anything before that. Oh, at one time, during my marriage, my ex-wife insisted I start seeing a therapist, as she said I had symptoms of depression. She prescribed Paxil, and all it did was give me RLS — Restless Leg Syndrome. So, I put the whole issue to bed for about ten years.
My mom is bipolar. My ex-wife was, and my son, who is no longer with us, had a particularly bad case. I don’t remember the names of many of the medications I have taken over the years. All I know is I feel “normal” with what I take now.
I don’t want to take them anymore, but I fear what might happen.
I Have WHAT?
There was a time in 2011 when I lost my health insurance for nearly a year. At the time, I was taking an antidepressant I had been prescribed, trazodone to help me sleep, and Abilify, a mood stabilizer…
