Why can a 15-year-old make $14 in his first month on Medium while my first month was not even close to half of that?
Why can a newbie who joined Medium for merely a month be curated multiple times, also a top writer and editor while I’ve been on the platform for three months and no curated articles yet?
Why is it that others achieve so much more in their first month while I’m not even making any significant progress on Medium?
I had two choices: to let these negative thoughts consume and take over me, or turn them into the motivation to strive. I chose the latter.
I’m not someone who is always looking at things on the bright side. I’m a pessimist all my life, and I dare say I still am now. I’m amazed that I can find a downside to everything in my life. Complaining has always been part of me, and it probably will for the foreseeable future, not because I don’t want to change, but because I feel more determined after complaining. Let me explain.
Complaining Shouldn’t Have a Bad Reputation
Complaining is often what a pessimist will do, and I totally agree. However, I’m not the typical average complainer who only complains and does nothing. After each complaint session, I give myself time to cool down, absorb, and accept what will happen or what has already happened. Then, I start acting on whatever I’m supposed to do, tackle that annoying school project, or attending that workout session I dread.
I’m an achiever, and I prove to those who say I can’t, that I can.
I don’t see a problem with complaining about the things we have to do, that’s if we take action after complaining. I’ve always been told that I should only complain about things after I’ve completed them, but I think otherwise. If I find whining about the things I have to do before actually getting them done, why not? It gets me motivated, so I will be continuing my ways, even if you disapprove.
According to exploringyourmind.com,
The act of complaining allows us to eliminate stress, release our frustration and allows us to recover the energy we need to overcome and address the problems we’re facing.
It is important to distinguish the emotional tone that we’re complaining in. If we are angry about something, complaining will allow us to release the discomfort and excess energy produced by the unhappiness. We could say it is good to bear in mind the pivotal moments of our negative emotions before we release our frustration in the wrong way.
Complaining doesn’t have to get a bad reputation for being an unhealthy habit; it can turn positive if we use it right. But there’s one thing you need to remember: life is unfair, and it will stay that way.
How Do I Succeed in Life?
The truth is: there is no magic formula. Our experiences are bound to be different. We can’t be them, and they can never be us. We can’t take credit for their success, and neither can they take credit for ours. This is life, and life will never be fair.
Some people are born rich and famous, while others have to work their asses off to put food on the table and pay their bills. But have you ever thought about how your fruit of labor is the sweetest? You’re the one who earned all that money, and you did not inherit any penny.
The money you spend is the result of your blood, sweat, and tears, and not someone else’s. You have created a name for yourself. You proved that you’re an achiever, not merely sitting on the couch at home getting money from their parents. Are all these not something to be proud of?
Jealousy brings us nowhere in life; it only damages our mental health. Why be jealous of others when you can do the same? Instead of wasting time sitting around and let jealousy overtake your mind, why not take action and stop whining about how life is unfair. Let me get this straight: life is unfair now, and it will never be. There are always better, luckier people who achieved great things within a short time frame.
We Will Never Be “Good Enough”
No matter how hard we try, we might never be on par with them, but we can be closer to them. It doesn’t matter if you take twice or thrice the time to achieve the same things they’ve achieved. Focus on the process rather than the outcome. To be honest, I would rather you fail a hundred times than succeed on your first try.
When you fail, you gain experience and figure out what didn’t work. At the end of the day, the person who has failed a hundred times has more tips and tricks up his sleeves than the person who succeeded on his first try. You’re set up for success in the long run because you know how to avoid a potential pitfall with the experiences you’ve gained from all those failures.
I don’t like using the term failure; trial-and-error is a much better word. Every failure is just an experiment, to stand up and try again.
I’m Not the Talented 17-Year-Old You Think I Am
In fact, I’m even close to being talented.
Growing up, I’m always the kid that’s not good enough. As an Asian family, my parents have high expectations of me, and I would get compared to my cousins every Chinese New Year. My cousins are scholars in my extended family, while I’m just an average student with average grades in school. My cousins would get into elite schools, while I could only qualify for neighborhood schools. They are top students in school without going for tuition and enrichment classes, while I had been attending extra curriculum classes ever since I was four, yet I wasn’t performing up to standard in school.
Despite all those comparisons, I didn’t let them get the better of me. I had something they don’t, my perseverance and determination to out-perform them. I may not be as smart as them, but I am definitely more willing to work harder than them. During the holidays, when other kids are enjoying, I’m doing a part-time job to gain some working experience. I’m at home mugging for exams on the weekends, when other kids are out with their friends.
I don’t have talent, but I have a mindset that sets me for success in the future. It may take me years to be where they are, but eventually, I’ll get there, with the experiences I’ve gained when working part-time. Just to set the context, many teenagers in Singapore are pampered and sheltered by our parents, so most of us aren’t willing to work at a young age. We are the generation where we are spoon-fed with answers.
Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.
If you’ve put your heart and soul into doing something long enough, there’s no reason you don’t get what you deserve.
