My name is Kirsty. I am an imposter.
Today I was asked what I do for a living. I paused.
What should I say?
I mean, I’m building a beach volleyball business, right? I should say beach volleyball coach, right? But it feels, well, just so wrong! I feel like I’m playing a game of make believe. I am an imposter.
That little voice in my head just kept chatting away “Who do you think you are? Eh? What have you ever done that qualifies you? Eh? Come on Kirsty — you’re a project manager, an office bod, an academic type. Beach Volleyball Coach? Pah”. And yes, it is a chatty little so’n so that voice in my head.
And this is my daily battle — sticking to the programme, staying true to me, my passions and my purpose, not giving in to the little voice. Every work day I take my daughter to nursery and then sit and go over my plans for the next 30 work days expecting to have to start again and, lo and behold, it all (still) makes perfect sense and all I can think is that it’s because I am sticking to my passions and purpose and suspending my disbelief in it all working its way out in the wash.
And do you know what? I also know I’m winning my daily battle little by little because it takes a little less time to convince myself that I’m doing the right thing every morning. I’m less and less drawn to the idea of just doing some kind of other job just to get a bit ahead of myself on the money front. I’m not in the slightest bit envious of others who have more and bigger and better stuff than I do — I have, or at least I’m working on having everything I could ever need and it’s all well and truly within grasp. I just have to keep telling myself that.
My name is Kirsty. I am a Beach Volleyball Coach. I am, and will continue, creating meaningful beach volleyball experiences for people that put a smile on their face, keep playfulness in their soul and leave sand between their toes.