Black Women: Protect Your Peace

You deserve love, support, and compassion.

This story is not to educate you about the impact of historical and ongoing racism and misogynoir on Black women’s health (it’s also not about explaining to you what “misogynoir” is).

Nor is my thesis about the very real inheritance of trauma many Black women experience as a result of epigenetics and spiritual endowments from Ancestors who survived centuries of terrorism.

A simple Google search will reveal the daunting stats that Black women battle chronic disease, critical medical emergencies, and potentially fatal health traumas every minute of every day.

I went live on YouTube to share this message. I invite you to take a look but I summarize my main points in this story…

These words are for Black women who have survived or are in the process of surviving a health crisis and trying to find their way forward. This is for Black women who have had a troublesome check-up or test result and know they need to change something. This is for Black women who feel depleted or just plain TIRED and know they need to take back their life.

I have been there. Repeatedly.

The doctors and nurses call me “miracle child,” and told me I must be “here for a purpose.”

After dying 3 times and surviving the “unsurvivable,” I thought I had a PhD in resiliency, transition, and transformation.

Turns out it was only an entry exam to master my life.

On top of my cardiac event in 2017 that came with a 1% survival rate, 3 open heart surgeries, 3 deaths, and 3 resuscitations…

I also survived infidelity then came to my senses and decided to survive divorce instead.

Then, in the fall of 2022, doctors found a large rare tumor impacting my health which resulted in another surgery.

Add to that other less dramatic but serious health issues as well as internal battles with anxiety and depression,

plus external battles with misogynoir and corporate America

and each stressor nearly left me without the will to rebuild and move forward, and yet I did.

EACH👏🏾 AND👏🏾 EVERY👏🏾 TIME👏🏾

Remembering who I am and how to love myself was and is the key🧡

Conventional wisdom tells us that people will understand that you likely have PTSD about your health and mortality and will hold space for you. In a perfect world, “they” will recognize that you need support, even when you don’t know you need it. “They” are your spouse, your partner, your kids, your family, your friends, your community, your co-workers, your boss… in short — all the humans in your life.

Maybe they truly empathize and show you sincere compassion, which is the definition of empathy. Or maybe they just end up comparing their pain with yours and centering themselves. Maybe they innocently sympathize with you and the overflow of their gratitude for their own life touches you and inspires your gratitude. Or maybe they just end up pitying you as they breathe a sigh of relief to not be in your shoes, which becomes an energetic burden on you.

Your body has been through tremendous stress and it’s fighting everyday to heal.

Sometimes what you need is alone time and very clear boundaries.

Protect your PEACE

• Protecting your peace has to be your top 1 , 2, and 3 priorities.
• Prioritize your own comfort, your own needs, your own goals, your own health.
• Be “selfish,” guard your peace like a precious treasure.
• Some people gonna be offended, not understand, throw a tantrum, project guilt onto you, try to bully you into shrinking, etc when you protect your peace…

F*ck ‘em.

Some of those people may not have a place in your Life 2.0: Post Crisis Edition.

Protecting your peace should not be something you have to do er’day, all day — that is a indication that some other major change is needed.

Maybe it’s new people in your life who can support you AND give you the space you need to heal. Or maybe your family and friends need to hear from you what your needs are and what you will and will not accept.

Maybe you need a different job or career or to advocate for accommodations like a lighter workload, remote work, reduced hours, or a leave of absence.

Maybe you need to relocate to a new state and start fresh. Maybe it’s time to “break-up” with the U.S. and leave the country.

If you can be still and listen to your own intuition, your own heart, you will know what you need to change in order to fully exhale and allow the intelligence of your body to take over the healing process.

The struggle is having the courage to take the necessary steps to release what no longer serves you.

Don’t let other folk’s lack of true empathy or understanding of how to hold space set you on a path back to a health crisis.

You deserve love, support, and compassion.

Protect Your Peace.

Remember Who The F*ck You Are.

***

Download my new FREE mini workbook!

I created this mini workbook as a gift to Black women seeking restoration and support as they rebuild after loss. I share concepts presented in my book, From Fat, Black, and Unlovable to Beautiful. Powerful. Love. I also link to audio recordings of “Micro Moments” guided meditations I referenced in the book. My hope is to that this mini workbook will be a catalyst for you to Remember Who The F*ck You Are.

Visit HERE to download https://remember.beautifulpowerfullove.com/miniworkbook