Divisional Round Playoff Predictions
The intern was a perfect 4–0 during last weekend’s Wildcard playoffs.
I mean, it worked. Right?
Only one home team gets out alive according to this week’s prognostications.
AFC
#3 PITTSBURGH STEELERS vs #2 KANSAS CITY CHIEFS
A Steelers victory over the Dolphins was never in doubt last week, but the stakes are raised this week: a road game versus the AFC West champion Kansas City Chiefs. The Chiefs have two dynamic playmakers in Tyreek Hill and Travis Kelce, and while Alex Smith isn’t a world-beater, he’s probably the best game manager-type QB in the league. In his post-season career, Smith has only thrown one interception in 186 attempts.
Pittsburgh, however, has the weapons to succeed offensively, with Big Ben, AB84 and Le’Veon. The three-pronged attack ran all over the Dolphins, and they should be able to pile on some points at Arrowhead. Kansas City will score as well, but not more than Pittsburgh, and even if they’ve got a gameplan to stop one of the dynamic Steeler trio, they’d be hard pressed to stop all three.
Steelers 27, Chiefs 24
#4 HOUSTON TEXANS vs #1 NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
Good on Houston for not screwing it up at home versus Oakland, but they didn’t show anything that would make anybody believe they have what it takes to knock off New England at home. It’s been five years since the Pats lost at home in the playoffs and Brock Osweiler is no Joe Flacco.
Houston’s defense needs to have a lights out performance against Tom Brady and co. if they want to give their team a chance. Jadaveon Clowney is finally turning into the productive defensive player we thought he’d be, the Texans have a great corner in Johnathan Joseph, and Romeo Crennel (who has three Super Bowl rings as a defensive coordinator with Bill Belichick) is the architect behind the league’s top defense…And it still won’t be enough to topple the Patriots. We just trust Belichick’s genius to get past Houston’s defensive schemes with a mix of rushing and passing, and they should have an easier time against Houston’s offense.
Even Texans fans don’t think they’ll win.
Patriots 31, Texans 10
NFC
#3 SEATTLE SEAHAWKS vs. #2 ATLANTA FALCONS
The Seattle Seahawks are on the road this week against Matt Ryan and arguably the best wide receiver in football, Julio Jones. Not only Seattle a little less formidable on the road — they don’t have the home advantage of Century Link Field and a crowd full of 12s — they are still without Earl Thomas, a key member of the Legion of Boom secondary. But it was good enough to demolish the Detroit Lions, albeit at home.
All eyes will be on Jones vs. Richard Sherman — Atlanta’s best receiver versus Seattle’s best cornerback, or will it? Seattle’s not tipping their hand on how often they’ll have Sherman on Jones, but I reckon he’ll be on him for quite some time. Jones had seven catches for 139 yards and a touchdown during his previous encounter against Seattle, but a breakdown from the Seattle Times says that he only caught three passes for 40 yards when Sherman was on him. Jones is targeted by Ryan 24 per cent of the time, of course.
If Jones is neutralized, Ryan will have to use Mo Sanu and Taylor Gabriel (who actually has 6 TDs this season, just like Jones) and his other receivers to his advantage as well as their run game. Seattle’s defense, however, has allowed the sixth-least rushing yards and seventh-least passing yards amongst NFL teams this season. The Falcons are a fantastic team, but the Seahawks waking up against them might not be too much of a surprise — but they’d certainly need an all-world performance from their secondary.
Seahawks 24, Falcons 21
#5 GREEN BAY PACKERS vs. #1 DALLAS COWBOYS
It’ll be a home game for two superstar rookies in Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliott of the Cowboys. They’ve certainly given Cowboys fans enough hope in the future and certainly for the present. They’ve got their best chance at making a Super Bowl appearance for the first time in a long time. Hell, they even beat the Packers AT Lambeau Field earlier this season. But they’ll still be in tough against Green Bay.
The man pictured above, Green Bay Packers wide receiver Jordy Nelson, won’t be available for the Pack against Dallas, which means more looks for guys like Randall Cobb and Davante Adams — who seems to have rediscovered his ability to catch the ball (watch this space if he drops passes versus Dallas). Ty Montgomery has established himself as a viable running option for the Packers and uhhhh, yeah, we don’t need to tell you who their quarterback is.
Green Bay’s defense needs to frustrate Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliott and force them to make rookie mistakes— perhaps they’ll take cues from the New York Giants, a team the Packers defeated in the Wildcard round last week.
Packers 24, Cowboys 20
