How Can You Find Yourself And Who Actually You Are
Physical, Social, Personal and Spiritual Answers
Most of life is spent getting to know oneself. ‘Who Am I?’
But who we are is a multi-layered issue. It doesn’t fit in one-sentence answers.
it gets more complicated as it is asked, it is surprised when it is found, and it continues to be sought as it is known.
Existential therapist Emmy Van Deurzen says the way we are in the world at any given moment in life can be located on the overall map of human existence.
Such a map can be of use to both therapists and clients in order to describe all layers of existence and see its dimensions.
Accordingly, our way of being in the world takes place in four different dimensions.
These are the physical, social, personal and spiritual dimensions.
These areas of existence can intertwine and intersect.
Pretending To Be Immortal
Although Deurzen has presented these as perspectives that can be used in therapy, if we look at which of these four dimensions we talk about a lot and which we have never experienced, maybe we will have a chance to have a general idea about our lives.
By focusing on what dimensions and with which contradictions we exist, we can support an in-depth look at ourselves.
According to Deurzen, there are challenges in all of these dimensions that we come into contact with throughout life.
These difficulties are unresolvable and cause anxiety, but touching them; It provides the will and determination needed to overcome them.
Now let’s take a look one by one. It is described in the book “Skills in Existential Counseling and Psychotherapy” as follows.
In the physical dimension, we relate to the environment.
Physical size; It encompasses the world we live in, our body, objects, geography, our state of health, and our relationship to our mortality.
The struggle here is between dominating the laws of nature and accepting them.
People plan to live a life of health and safety, but life is disappointing by showing that it is only temporary.
We know we are mortal, but we pretend to be immortal.
Choosing our stance on life is how we view death.
Wanting To Both Merging And Dividing
While we need others physically and emotionally, we also have to deal with them.
We all face loneliness, our loneliness and the fact that no one can know what it’s like to be ‘me’.
Yet we are connected to other people. We want to be understood by them.
If I am aware of my separateness from others, I can understand and respect them.
But the unsolvable dilemma here is that we have both the need for individuality and the need to be part of a whole.
On the one hand, we want to merge and on the other hand, we want to be divided.
Creating A Personal Value System
We cannot come to terms with the fragility of being human as long as we pretend to be invulnerable.
The unsolvable dilemma is that we continue to look for immutable principles within which we can live, even if we can make our own choices.
In the spiritual dimension, we relate to the unknown.
It is a place where one can take a step outside and look at what is happening in one’s life.
We create an ideal sense of the world and a system of personal values.
We find meaning and purpose.
We want to believe that our system of values is absolute and valid for all time.
Because our system of values gives us an idea of right and wrong.
But we have to face only what has been determined by us.
Absurdity starts here.
In general, the aim is to create a universal value, to go beyond human mortality, to make a contribution.
Does Ignorance Bring Happiness?
It can be helpful to ask ourselves from time to time.
Where am I in all these dimensions, how do I experience what and which have I never experienced?
Where am I most stuck and what do I need to expand and relax?
How do I come into contact with these big and difficult issues?
In what dimension of my being do I feel more comfortable?
What dimension am I at the most precarious point about?
And to repeat: ‘Who am I?’
What will we gain by asking these questions?
It will enable us to understand the places where we are stuck in life, the cycles and knots in which we get lost, and maybe take action with this understanding.
Knowing who we are is not a goal to be reached, but a path to be walked.
Not yet a Medium Member? Join now with my referral link and Earn Income From Writing Just 3 Min/Day About Your Thoughts & What You Love to do! You’ll also get full access to every story on Medium for just $5/mo. Your membership fee supports independent writing. I’ll earn a small commission at no additional cost to you!
Thanks for reading. I hope you’ve found my articles at least slightly compelling. If it interested you ever more slightly, you could kindly consider leaving a clap or following for more stories. Let me know what you think in the comment, too!
If you enjoyed this article, you might also like:
