Maybe Pixar was Right

If the Rift is released with a focus on social networking, then we can pretty much all head to Walmart and buy our red spandex jumpsuits.

With the purchase of Oculus VR by Facebook today, we were given a peek into the future that Mark Zuckerberg has planned for all of us. Mark has been quite public about his views on a connected world. His side project, internet.org, is attempting to connect the world through affordable internet access.

So, when he made a post after the information on the acquisition was made public, it was no surprise that Zuck thinks that the Oculus Rift, a virtual reality platform, is more of a social tool than a gaming tool.

Quite frankly, if Mark would have stated that the Rift had massive potential outside of the gaming industry for purposes such as training, rehabilitation, or psychotherapy, I would have found that easier to grasp. Obviously the Rift could be a huge boon to any one of those aforementioned activities plus many thousands more.

But when he went right to social, it got me thinking of another tool that was also used for social networking — The Hover Chair from Wall-E.

In the movie, humans in the future exist in a dystopian society. They are mindless consumers that buy whatever is thrown at them by their favorite brand and they sit in chairs staring at screens all day. Come to think of it, Pixar really didn’t look that far into the future for their image of society. The movie is seven years old and we’re already 90 percent of the way there.

But with the Facebook purchase of the Oculus Rift, we’re sure to plow through that remaining 10 percent and end up as shapeless masses that do nothing but eat, sit, and stare at screens all day.

Already there are voices from members of the older generation that comment on how our digital lives have robbed us of our enjoyment for the outdoors, our zeal for socializing with friends, and is responsible for the general malaise that has afflicted teenagers (I stopped short of calling them whippersnappers). Well, those voices are about to become a lot louder and a lot more concerned.

Trust me… No one smiles this much while looking at their phone.

The Rift is still in development, but could see a release in the next 24 months. If it is released with a focus on social networking, then we can pretty much all head to Walmart and buy our red spandex jumpsuits.

Luckily, there is still some shred of our humanity that craves personal interaction. It’s what drives us to put down Facebook, Twitter, Google+ (I kid… no one uses Google+), and step out into the real world. While staring at pictures of people’s vacations, dinner, and parties is fun up to a point, it doesn’t really replace the real thing.

But just wait a few years and you’ll see an email just like this in your inbox:

From: Grechen Winger

Subject: Paaartay! Be there or be square.

Hey Guys,

I’m throwing a big shindig this weekend to celebrate my graduation. I know that a lot of my friends and family are scattered all over the country, so I thought it would be a good idea to host the party on Facebook. You can log in with your Oculus Rift and enter the lobby code 122–969–033. I’m asking that everyone please dress their avatars appropriately (my Papa and Grandma will be attending).

Also, you can send graduation gifts to 111 Elm St Provo, UT.

I’m so excited! EEeeek!

Thanks so much for coming.

Smooches.

– Grech

I suppose there are advantages to a society that will shun personal interaction altogether. Quite frankly, I don’t enjoy showering every day. And no matter what my dentist tells me, I refuse to believe that a human being needs to brush their teeth twice a day. Brushing should be used to remove the fuzz — nothing else.

So, when Zuck finally achieves his connected world goals and we’re all staring bleary-eyed at screens all day and drooling into our keyboards, I at least won’t have to take part in these tiresome hygiene rituals. I’ll just sit on my Oculus Rift, send my avatar to the gym twice a week, eat Cheetos until I’m sick, and still be the social butterfly that I love to be.

Maybe I’m being too harsh on the Harvard dropout. Maybe he doesn’t want us all to become nothing more than wallets attached to keyboards. I’m sure his vision for the Oculus Rift will become clearer in the coming months. But until I know his true intent, I’m disconnecting my devices, moving into a cabin in Montana, and putting on my tinfoil hat.

If Facebook buys a hover technology company in the coming years. Then all bets are off.

Mike Templeman is the CEO of Foxtail Marketing, a content marketing firm located in Lehi, Utah. He enjoys writing about startups, marketing, and the tech industry. When not tapping away at his keyboard, you can find him hiking a mountain trail with his kids.

Published 3/26/2014