Responding to the Grief of Others

A personal story and discussion of relevant research on stigma and loss.

Photo by Los Muertos Crew from Pexels

One dark Friday evening in 1979, a father returned home with a terrible burden, to tell the three of his children who were home that their 43-year-old mother had died that day after a long battle with cancer. I was the youngest of those three. The date was November 2 — forty-two years ago today. Over time, I’ve worked with and reflected upon that experience to arrive at a place of relative peace.

KEY POINTS

• Prolonged grief reactions — severe, persistent responses to the death of a close other — affect 1 in 10 people experiencing loss.
• The way we perceive and respond to people who have lost a loved one varies, and has a strong impact on the bereaved.
• Research finds greater public stigma toward those who have a severe grief reaction to loss.
• Understanding the stigma around loss helps us support those in need and anticipate our own needs around grieving.

Approximately 5 percent of children lose a parent early on in life, making it rare among peers and socially challenging. Children with early parental loss are more likely to experience a variety of problems, including greater risk for depression and anxiety…