The Transformational Power of “I’m Sorry”
Why “Real Leaders” Take Responsibility for Their Actions to Accelerate Momentum
Leadership is more than directing teams, driving performance, reading a balance sheet, or tackling the myriad issues that cross our desks. Its role is grounded in integrity, respect, and accountability — values often overlooked in today’s fast-paced, results-demanding world. One of the most powerful ways leaders can embody these values is by saying two simple words: “I’m sorry” when the situation requires correction.
Too often, leaders avoid apologies out of fear that admitting fault will expose vulnerability — and make them look less than perfect. This is a dangerous misconception. No one is perfect. Owning mistakes demonstrates confidence, emotional intelligence, and an unwavering commitment to doing what’s right — not just what’s expedient. To admit a mistake is to be self-aware, and many in leadership roles might see this as a weakness. However, more often than not, the people we seek to mobilize know that moment — and the lost moment — as a tear in the fabric of trust and organizational momentum hits the pause button.
Leaders who take responsibility earn back respect because they acknowledge reality rather than deflecting blame or whitewashing out-of-step behavior. They build stronger communities where people feel safer and can express themselves. This is part of the investment toward creating communities built to last — taking personal responsibility.
“If You Can Break It, You Can Fix It”
Eighteenth-century Ukrainian religious leader Rebbe Nachman of Uman taught, “If you can break it, you can fix it.” This timeless wisdom applies to personal and professional relationships, where mistakes are inevitable. But the power of repairing those breaks lies in how we respond — our mindset and actions.
An apology is not just about easing the pain of the person harmed — it is also about restoring the humanity of the person who caused the harm. By admitting fault and committing to making things right, leaders show that they are responsible for their actions and capable of meaningful change. It is the spiritual version of the childhood cry: “Do over!” It nurtures a clear conscience.
More than two centuries later, Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella emphasizes empathy and accountability as leadership skills. During the company’s organizational transformation — its dramatic leadership shift from iconic Bill Gates to a next-generation CEO — Nadella acknowledged mistakes and took direct action to address them. In his business bestseller Hit Refresh, he reflects on how being vulnerable and apologizing when needed strengthened Microsoft’s culture and sparked further innovation. His leadership philosophy aligns with the idea that accountability nurtures trust.
In 2018, after a racially charged incident at a Starbucks Philadelphia location, then-Executive Chairman Howard Schultz issued a direct apology and shut down all stores for dedicated employee bias training. Schultz’s readiness to confront the company’s failure head-on rebuilt public trust and underscored Starbucks’ commitment to meaningful change. It called for a $16.7 million investment, but together with a complete, proactive apology, it saved the coffee chain’s reputation.
“I’m Sorry” Without Caveats
Saying “I’m sorry” without qualifiers or conditions is rare in business today. Too many apologies are diluted by phrases like “I’m sorry if you felt that way” or “I’m sorry but…” These half-measures aren’t apologies but thinly veiled attempts to sidestep responsibility. They even enflame situations, making people feel unheard of and dismissed.
A genuine apology is direct and clear: “I’m sorry. I was wrong.” Full stop. No conditions, no justifications or qualifiers. This clarity communicates respect for those affected and signals a commitment to making things right.
Studies in organizational behavior consistently highlight the role of authentic apologies in fostering trust. Karina Schumann, PhD, a University of Pittsburgh-based expert in conflict resolution, describes apologies as “the super glue of life,” emphasizing in an American Psychology Association interview their capacity to rebuild relationships and demonstrate care for those involved.
Moving Forward with Integrity
Saying “I’m sorry” doesn’t erase mistakes. It opens the door to trust, healing, and progress. Hurtful actions or words may be remembered. However, so will a heartfelt apology. In leadership — as in life — the ability to own our actions, make amends, and move forward with integrity defines our character. It helps us sleep better at night.
Rebbe Nachman’s 18th-century wisdom reminds us that the capacity to fix what is broken rests in our hands — but only if we are willing to admit what’s broken in the first place. Accountability is not about perfection; it’s about momentum. Strong leaders admit when they fall short, learn from their mistakes, inspire their teams through honesty and courage, and press onward!
Never underestimate the power of two simple words — “I’m sorry” — spoken from the heart.
Because leadership isn’t about being right — it’s about doing right.
