Diversity as a missionary kid
Missionary students may look the same as other students, but what they have experienced adds diversity to campus.
By Annalise Beeson | Royal Report
Elementary education student Ben Eller sat in physics class when the professor called on him to answer a question.
“What did you get for the boiling point of water in Fahrenheit?”
Eller looked around at his classmates, some of whom were smirking. Eller exhaled and let out a nervous laugh when he said, “I don’t know.” The physics professor immediately launched into a lecture about why future teachers need to know this, when Eller spoke up again and said, “I’m from Spain, so I only know the metric system,” causing the professor to sheepishly retract his lecture and call on another student to answer the question.
“I have the privileges of a white American male, but I don’t consider myself like every other American most of the time.” — Ben Eller, missionary student
Eller was born in Guatemala and moved to Spain, where his parents still live as missionaries, when he was 11. Eller’s last year and a half at Bethel University marks the longest period of time he’s spent in the U.S. Like many missionary students coming to college in America, Eller has faced the day-to-day challenges of adjusting to and understanding a new culture, while trying not to lose his cultural identity.
“I classify myself as a Latino sometimes,” Eller said. “I have the privileges of a white American male, but I don’t consider myself like every other American most of the time.”
This fall, 49 students at Bethel come from missionary families, many of whom look like they’re from Roseville. Missionary students bring a diversity to Bethel while also facing everyday challenges unfamiliar to most college students.
Not growing up in the Midwest, let alone the United States, one of the first changes Bethel’s mission students face is shock at Minnesota’s weather. Eller experienced this coming from Malaga, Spain, which is called the “coast of the sun” with a desert climate and rain about 30 days a year.
“Minnesota winters have a crap ton of snow,” Eller said.
He tried to embrace the winter, however, by buying his first winter coat and snow pants and taking a snowboarding class over J-term.
Another change Eller faced was learning to drive in the United States. He drove a Vespa in Spain but never had a full driving license. The process of getting a license in the United States can take six months of waiting, followed by having someone with a Minnesota license drive with you for a period of time.
“Driving is stupid in Spain. It’s so expensive and hard to get. It’s nuts, so I only had a motorcycle license,” Eller said. “I learned stick shift, in Spain but never really drove. Now my car in America is a stick shift which is kind of nice so no one can borrow my car.”
Little things like finding places to go for a haircut and a doctor’s appointment are among the things mission students have to figure out on their own. Freshman year, Eller had to borrow friends’ cars to go to the hospital for an ear infection, where he faced another challenge with dealing with insurance to cover his hospital visit. His family’s insurance from Spain doesn’t cover expenses in the United States, making him pay for it out of pocket. Due to these difficulties, whenever Eller goes home, he has six appointments set up over a two-week period.
More obvious challenges for mission students are not seeing their families often and not having anywhere to go during holidays. Eller’s parents and brother came to visit him in October, but he went six months without seeing them. Eller, like many MKs, only goes home for Christmas. For other holidays, mission students go to a friend’s or professor’s house or stay at Bethel.
Bethel tries to assist students going through these challenges in a variety of ways. Eller said Bethel did a better job of recruiting and encouraging missionary students to apply than other Christian colleges, helping them to feel like they are welcome on campus. Bethel also has a club on campus, Mu Kappa, for missionary kids, third-culture kids and international students.
“People expect us to accept the culture if we look American, but culture is how you feel in a certain situation.”–Nadia Jacobson, Mu Kappa student leader
MK Student leader Nadia Jacobson describes Mu Kappa as a support club that strives to help these students through the transition of entering a new culture while not forgetting the culture they grew up in. Mu Kappa celebrates big events in a college student’s life that MKs and TCKs don’t always commemorate and helps them through the challenges of time zone changes, culture shock and getting use to the quirky things in American culture. The main role of Mu Kappa for many students is to be a place to celebrate the culture in which they grew up.
“People expect us to accept the culture if we look American, but culture is how you feel in a certain situation,” Jacobson said. “And growing up 18 years in a different place makes how you feel and react different than everyone who grew up here.”
Some missionary students find it difficult to make decisions. Many of them grew up in environments where their whole lives were decided for them and nothing was definite. That thinking has followed into college, as well, making everyday decisions hard because they don’t know if anything is for sure.
More seriously, MKs and TCKs find that world problems are a reality for them. Since they are all from other countries, what is on the news can be more real to them. Jacobson said there was a girl in Mu Kappa who grew up in the Middle East and worked several summers in a Syrian camp, and when the Syrian refugee crisis started, it hit her hard. Unlike other college students, international news could be local news for missionary students.
Bethel professors also help to welcome these students. Several professors are from missionary backgrounds and can relate to these students in a way that others cannot, enabling them to give advice from shared experiences. The advisesr of Mu Kappa, Carol Chang, is one professor many students find comfort in talking to. Bethel also offers counseling for students going through the culture transition if they would like. One of the best ways for these students to have an easier transition is getting connected to a Minnesota family to host them throughout the year and during holidays especially, according to Jacobson. This is a harder way to get connected since usually the students have to be the ones willing to reach out, but opportunities are available.
Eller usually stays at his roommate or girlfriend’s house over breaks. Overall, he enjoys the freedom and responsibility that comes with being in a new country, but there are some annoying challenges. Eller says his least favorite part is the misunderstanding that comes with being a missionary kid.
“It drives me insane when people treat me as any other privileged white kid. Yo, yo, I’ve lived out of the country for the past 18 years. When they group us together I really represent my own little group. I have the privileges of both groups, but I have the problems of both groups as well,” Eller said.
Eller said he does not feel like a minority even though he relates as a Latino more often than as an American. He admits that looking like a white American male is a powerful thing in society today. When Eller was in high school, he and his family were in Morocco working at a Christian surf camp when a fight broke out and a crowd gathered in the streets. Eller’s mom raised up their American passports, causing the crowd to step aside and allow the Eller family to walk through unharmed.
“Being an American is a powerful thing and looking like one is even more powerful.”–Eller
Another incident from the same time in Morocco occurred when a person with a knife was around the area of their camp. The police surrounded and protected the camp, even though they normally were hostile to the camp because of their Christianity.
“The police didn’t want to deal with Americans being stabbed in their country on the news. Being an American is a powerful thing and looking like one is even more powerful,” Eller said.
Appearances and experiences don’t go hand in hand, Jacobson pointed out. The challenges one missionary kid or third-culture kid experience are not what all or even one other missionary kid faces. It depends on each individual person and many other factors, not just where they were born or what language they first speak.
“It’s been important for me to realize that everyone experiences homesickness,” Jacobson said. “Whether you live five minutes away or in a different country, what you’re feeling is real and valid. The only thing we all have in common is that we don’t have anything in common.”
