Sierra learns about love
Sierra Smith experiences vulnerability in her relationships at college and YWAM.
By Emma Eidsvoog | Clarion Correspondent
The summer following her high school graduation, Sierra Smith stood at the bottom of a valley gazing up at the Colorado mountains surrounding a small cabin where she found refuge from the rain. In that moment she “felt so close to God” while her heart was heavy from a difficult decision made two weeks earlier.
In Minnesota, Smith sat in her boyfriend Spencer’s 2017 black Chevy pick-up where she ended their two-year relationship.
After saying goodbye and turning to leave he spat on her head in anger as she stepped outside. Her foot barely touched the ground before he peeled out of the driveway and out of her life.
“It just felt freeing,” Smith said after two years of trying to explain her actions to a high schooler who failed to trust her. She moved into Bethel University the following fall where she started a new chapter of her life without Spencer.
“As humans we cannot physically, emotionally, spiritually fill that for each other,” Smith said, “It was an opportunity for God to remind me that he fills that space, that void.”
In the spring of 2018 during her sophomore year at Bethel, Smith joined Youth With A Mission, and traveled to Hawaii, Thailand, and the Philippines. Smith’s days spent with girls sexually abused by family, boys in a juvenile detention center, and hospital patients showed her the struggles of a people far from her privileged life. The culture of the Philippines especially surprised Smith.
“That culture is so intentional about getting to know you. They just want to sit down and talk to you for hours,” Smith said, “They really care about what your saying.”
While in the Philippines, Smith stayed in a house for abused girls waiting for their abusers to be sent to jail. Their stories and faces were not easily forgotten by the YWAM student.
“Some of them are six years old and they’re these sweet little girls,” Smith said. “It’s like ‘how could anyone abuse you?’”
Despite being hurt at a young age the girls spent every day reading their bibles, learning bible lessons and singing worship songs. The adoration the Filipino girls showered on Smith and their desire to know God left an impact and she couldn’t help but love them.
Smith’s experiences in a culture vastly different from her own taught her love requires vulnerability. Upon returning to Bethel the next fall for her junior year, Mary Hitt, a friend and roommate from Bethel, noticed this change in Smith. After spending the night with her sister who would be soon moving to Oregon, Smith returned to Bethel saddened by the change. Hitt asked if she was okay and Smith replied, “No, I’m not.”
“It’s one of the first times I’ve ever seen her cry,” Hitt said.
Hitt remembered one day at the beginning of their sophomore year when she herself struggled with being far from home.
“I live four hours away and she [Smith] said ‘If you need to go home, I will drive you home right now’. She’s so selfless,” Hitt said.
Rebecca Brubaker, Smith’s cousin who attends Bethel and plays with Smith on the soccer team, remembers sitting in the back of the soccer van on their way to a game in Iowa. They shared with each other their experiences of being out of the country, Smith in the Philippines and Brubaker in Guatemala for study abroad.
“She’s one of the people that I know wants to hear about it,” Brubaker said.
Smith’s ex-boyfriend taught her the wrong way to love, but through YWAM and time spent at Bethel she learned how to love with intention.
Sierra Smith gazed up at Filipino mountains looming above her. Pineapple fields spread along the acres surrounding the small house where she stayed with young Filipino girls who “hung onto every word she said.” The sun began to set, flashing purple, pink, and orange hues across the sky.
Wow. God is crazy.
