Better Advice
7 Truths Most People Don’t Want To Hear (But Need To Hear)
Change happens when you accept these harsh truths.
We all want to grow and evolve, but we refuse to hear the harsh truths because it hurts our little egos.
But how can you expect to grow if you don’t face the things that block you from growing?
We think we are always right, and sometimes we believe the lies we tell ourselves. You may have been raised to believe the lies your family has told you to believe.
You won’t get far in life if you keep running away from the harsh truths.
Why are we so scared of hearing the harsh truth?
I’ve heard this quote before:
“Change is scary, but so is staying the same.”
People who want to change have to face the harsh truth, but no one wants to hear that, so we stay in our comfort zone and believe the lies we tell ourselves.
If you can accept these harsh truths and do something about them, you’ll see your life change for the better.
You become a brand new person with refreshed opinions and beliefs.
You become smarter and wiser.
1. No one is forcing you to do anything.
Don’t fool yourself into thinking people force you to do anything.
Once you’re 18 years old, you’re an adult.
Stop letting your parents treat you like a child (especially if you’re coming from a brown household). You're an adult who can do anything in life.
No one has power over you.
Some continue to live with family after turning 18 (which is fine.) but the problem is that you still let your family decide how you live your life.
Marry someone from the same culture; do this to your poor toxic parents, or there will be consequences…
“Why are you hanging out with your friends?”
“Why are you doing this?"
“No, you’re doing this the wrong way.”
“Why are you still posting content? No one is watching them anymore.”
Oh my God, shut up.
No one is pointing a gun at your head. You don’t have to marry someone from the same culture. You don’t have to do anything they tell you to do.
It’s not real love if your loved ones tell you what to do, can’t accept your “no”s and boundaries, and get mad at you because you have.. a choice?
That person who cringes at your content? Tell them, “I never asked for your opinion… I do whatever I want." and keep posting content.
You don’t owe your toxic family anything.
Your friend is not your real friend.
Your toxic parents or toxic friends want to control you, and you're going to grow sick and brainwashed if you don’t start defending yourself sooner.
It may cost your mental health, and you may have to go through many fights with them, but the future only gets better as they start to leave you alone because you told them off.
The biggest middle finger you can give them is to make more money than them, move out, and achieve success from your content.
And if you can’t move out at the moment, keep making money and save it.
No one is forcing you to be in this toxic workplace. You can quit and get the job of your dreams.
If that’s not the ideal situation for you, try to make a side hustle, and once it becomes a full-time income, quit that toxic workplace.
No one is telling you to do anything.
If they do, they’re control freaks.
Your bad friend is always negative. You both want to go to a cafe, but your friend doesn’t want to go to the cafe that you want to try. It’s always their way or nothing.
You don’t have to stay with a bad friend just because you knew them when you were kids. Cut that friendship if they always control the friendship because they don’t care about your boundaries.
2. Successful people are not special compared to you.
They’re just regular people.
Just like you.
The only difference is that they spend time every day learning how to be successful, while you’re wasting your time binge-watching TV shows every day.
There is nothing wrong with being entertained; you’re allowed to relax.
The problem is if you waste more time being entertained than doing or creating something that will benefit your life for the better.
Stop obsessing over celebrities; they aren’t paying your bills.
All you have to do is spend more time creating than consuming.
80% creating, 20% consuming.
or
50% creating and 50% consuming.
You make the rules, as long as you spend more time creating than consuming. You will figure out what works for you.
You don’t have to create something every day; you can take a week off just to enjoy your life a little bit, but always remember to be on track.
Spend time creating ways to make more money, improve your life, learn multiple skills, and create new relationships with good people.
3. Your “toxic” friend may be telling you the truth.
Think about it.
What if you were the toxic one?
Our ego doesn’t like to hear that.
Sometimes we paint an image of someone quickly and easily because we've got low consciousness and a lack of understanding about the whole picture.
We are so quick to point fingers at everyone and say they’re the toxic ones…
“You are the toxic one.” and “I’m just too good for people.” kind of mindset. No, stop being delusional about thinking you’re just too good for people.
Maybe good people are too good for you because you’ve disrespected them over and over again. It’s so hard for us people to see our own flaws.
“What happened to the good men and women?” — They are with a good partner.
You are not able to see yourself from a third-person perspective, and if you did, you would realize all the flaws you had.
Maybe it’s the universe, or maybe God is talking to you through your friends about the wrong things you do.
You realize you were the bad friend the whole time, and you realize you have been verbally abusive to someone you loved in the past.
You find out that the things you said and did were the cause of ruined friendships.
You don’t necessarily have to be a bad person to do these things, as long as you feel guilty about what you did and do something to work on yourself, so you can be a better friend in the future and talk to people with respect.
4. Not everyone will like you; stop trying hard to impress people.
You’re going to waste your time trying to make everyone like you.
You won’t be everyone’s cup of tea. You can try your hardest to make people understand why you’re a great person, and they will still find reasons to dislike you.
And most of the time, people don’t have a reason to hate you; they’re just filled with trauma, insecurity, and deep hatred for themselves.
Some people hate themselves so much that they will express their own inner hatred toward other people. They have issues to heal from.
They want to make other people suffer just like them.
You know what I think?
Stop trying to impress people.
And start trying to impress your future self.
You should try hard to make your future self proud. I believe there are more rewards in impressing your future self than random strangers.
Your future self would be proud of you for never trying to impress people, don’t you think? I think so. It’s one of the best ways to give yourself love.
Life is too short to try to make everyone like you.
5. No one is going to help you but yourself.
You can read all the books you want about improving your life.
But what’s the point if you don’t do something about it today?
I’m not saying you can do journaling, meditation, visualizing, and affirming all day. You should continue to do them, especially if these methods bring you joy as if you’re already in a state of having your wish fulfilled.
But you also have to be aware that no one is going to help you achieve your dreams but yourself. Your future depends on what you do today.
People are too busy focusing on creating their own dream life. The only thing people can do is give you motivation and support your dreams.
Life can be difficult if we don’t help ourselves, but life becomes easier if you keep working on improving yourself and finding ways to achieve financial freedom, so your future self will worry less.
If you just do something every day to help yourself, then you’re on the right track. You don’t necessarily have to overwork and get no sleep to achieve your dreams.
It’s not healthy for your mind and body.
Some people work 50 hours a week, but you don’t have to do that. You have to work at your own pace. You may have to work hard in the beginning before you can work less in the future.
Taking action while visualizing your goals will only speed up the process.
6. Your difficult moment is your biggest lesson.
I know the heartbreak was difficult for you.
It has completely changed your world in a different way. You see love in a different way. But you never go through a breakup without gaining a lesson from it.
You quit the toxic workplace, and it was the biggest blessing for you. It taught you not to work in a place that puts you in a dark place, and it gave you the opportunity to work in a job that brings you passion.
Whether it’s freelance work, your own business, or just a different 9–5 job that made you happier than the last one.
You made and lost friends, but it taught you what type of friends you should and shouldn’t have in your life.
The lesson is that you should have high standards too when it comes to friendships.
You realize you don’t want a friend who gossips a lot; it’s a waste of time for you because you’d rather spend time with friends who just want to have fun and have meaningful conversations.
7. You get hurt because you have high expectations from people.
I used to be like this: I had high expectations from people.
I was naive to believe that everyone would be as loyal as I am.
But boy, I was wrong.
I was disappointed.
Now I am in a place in my life where I have zero expectations from people.
I take things slow when it comes to friendships because it takes time before you really get to know someone. You have to wait before you decide on someone to be your friend.
Give yourself months to a year before you really consider this person your friend. Allow them to walk out of your life when the time is coming.
You shouldn’t expect anything from those people, even if you become friends with them. Just appreciate having them in your life and appreciate them being a part of your journey when they leave.
You won’t get hurt if you have no expectations from people.
Not everyone has the same big heart as you.
There are times when I wish everyone had a big heart like ours, but that’s not the world we live in now.
It doesn’t mean you won’t find your kind of people, but it will take some time to meet the right ones who will reciprocate the same kind of love back to you.
The final conclusion...
It’s possible to be on the right path in life if you are able to accept these harsh truths. Always question your beliefs and opinions.
The most important part is to not take it personally but to see it as an opportunity to work and improve yourself.
You see the mistakes you’re making, and you’re doing something about it.
No one is telling you to do anything. You have free will to do whatever you want. Live your life on your own terms, not by toxic people who should mind their own business.
Successful people are not different from you; they spend their time finding ways to become more successful instead of procrastinating.
Think about the things your friend said: Is she or he right? Are they telling me the truth? What makes me appear like a negative person? Maybe they were right all along?
Stop wasting your time trying to make people like you. You become confident when you don’t care if people like you or not.
The older I get, the less I care.
Your future depends on you. Do something every day that your future self will thank you for. When you spend a little bit every day doing something that will benefit your future, you will feel a lot better about yourself.
Find the blessings in your most difficult moments. Sometimes, bad things happen because they’re teaching us a lesson we’re going to use in the future. It’s never a loss; it’s a gain.
Stop having high expectations from people; give yourself time to get to know someone for months, and don’t get sad if it doesn’t work out; it just means someone better will enter your life.
