Make Frustration a Thing of the past in Communication — Here’s How to Use Nonviolent Communication

Martin Luther Jnr and Mahatma Gandhi did it

Damian Clark
Better Advice
Published in
5 min readJan 24, 2023


Photo by RODNAE Productions:

To deliver an effective message, you don’t have to be Martin Luther Jnr or Mahatma Gandhi.

Dr. Marshall B. Rosenberg’s Non-Violent Communication is a method to sprinkle fairy dust on a heated and frustrating conversation.

Know your WHY before you get started

I have lost count of the number of beetroot faces I had pulled because of a misalignment between me and my bosses, mom, noisy neighbors, sister, and 5-year-old nephews when trying to communicate effectively with them.

It’s like we were on different planets.

With nonviolent communication, you can lose your frustration face because this method replaces your old patterns of defending, withdrawing, or attacking when faced with judgment and criticism.

You will perceive your partner’s demands for packing the dishwasher in a certain way, in a new light.

Benefits of nonviolent communication:

  • Be aware of our own true needs.
  • Establish a connection with our own needs.
  • To build a connection with another person through empathy.
  • Create depth to existing relationships with your angry, demanding boss, annoying mother-in-law, or beautiful partner.
  • Avoid circular arguments.

Burning calories is best done at a yoga class or during hot sex. Not by yelling at each other.

It’s not about the dishwasher

“Nonviolent communication is a way of speaking and listening that facilitates the flow of communication needed to exchange information and resolve differences peacefully. …Focuses our attention on compassion as our motivation rather than fear, guilt, blame or shame.”

— Dr. Marshall B. Rosenberg, Nonviolent



Damian Clark
Better Advice

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