How to Relieve Yourself From Unnecessary Worries: Use This Mindset Shift to Unburden Your Mind

Embrace the “What Now” mindset and set forth to a more peaceful journey of life.

Orestis Spanos
Mar 12 · 4 min read
https://cdn.pixabay.com/photo/2015/03/16/10/59/sunset-675847_1280.jpg

Life nowadays is passing in front of our eyes as fast as a flash. So many events are taking place and we should somehow be able to analyze them and act on them. However, the sad truth is that we’re just reacting to them thoughtlessly and reflexively.

This rapid-changing reality forces you to learn how to predict situations in order to survive. And it’s true, to a point, this habit of prejudging and presuming situations is beneficial for your life. However, it transforms into an immense problem when you’re constantly over-analyzing anything before you’ve actually tried it.

You’ve become a passive observer of life who lurks in a latent state. You are acted upon by life circumstances. You’ve stopped seeking opportunities and you don’t initiate anything new. You even end up neglecting a lot of them, as you’re waiting for the right moment. But life is brutally honest with that — There is no such thing as a perfect moment.

Life is moving forward and you’ve been left behind. Nonetheless, you can do something about it. It’s until you change your perspective throughout which you’re experiencing the world. Only then, you’ll take back control of your life. But in order to do that, you need to leave behind a certain bad habit.

Let me explain.

Understand When The “What If” Becomes “What the Hell”

I’m sure you can relate to this. A beautiful person was standing at the bar. You had even exchanged one-two glances. He/She was definitely your type. You truly wanted to go and say hi. However, your mind sabotaged you. You started creating a mixture of countless scenarios of what could go wrong.

So, you ended up returning home not only with disappointment but with bewilderment too. “What if that happened?” That burning curiosity eliminated your sleep that night. When we’re always preassuming things we tend to pointlessly overthink and overanalyze. We create mental movies in our heads that we can’t control. We become prisoners of ourselves.

Of course, to be fair, looking ahead can save you from potential mistakes and make you get away with silly things. However most of the time, you’re self-sabotaging. You’re departing from the now. You’re roaming without a compass in the past or the future. Therefore, you lose reality.

You start living in an imaginary world, which seems to be real and compelling at the same time. Because your thoughts are keeping you safe; It’s just you and your harmless thoughts. You don’t take risks. However, these phenomenally harmless thoughts are depriving you of your wants and of the life that you’re looking for.

So how you survive and tackle that exhausting mental reality that you fabricate?

Shift to “What Now”

Stay on what you can confront! Understand that a mental projection you’re creating is untamable. Most of the time, our thoughts escalate to the point that our imagination rages.

You need to realize this. We can’t control the millions of possible outcomes of life. If you try to control what you can’t, you will end up being angry and unhappy about the world. So to avoid that make a shift. Embrace “What Now”. With this mindset you take action, and then you calibrate what to do, how to act. Therefore, you become proactive. And with proactivity, you gain power over your life.

You will start focusing on the things you can actually control and directly affect. Because our attention should be drawn always to what we can regulate. Or as Epictetus had stated:

“The chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control.” — Epictetus, Discourses, 2.5.4–5

If you’re being exposed to the waves of a present that you can’t rule on, you won’t be able to survive and hence thrive in it.

Final Thoughts.

So, anytime you find yourself overwhelmed by overanalyzing and spending hours, days, even months getting worried about the things that can happen, pause a minute and mentor yourself: “Is this something I can control directly, now? Or am I trying to predict and control the future?

By doing that, you force yourself to stay in the now, in reality, and you don’t add yourself extra pointless burdens that you can’t regulate. Essentially what we only have power on, is the now. Like Echart Tolle once said: “There isn’t past or future, there is just a timeless now.” So are you in the now?

And if you’re really anticipating a problem to come, wait for it, and then decide how to act. Don’t burn your energy to somehow analyze it and magically “mentally solve” it. No problem is solved without acting upon it.

‘Better Advice’ free email advice each week

When you sign up using this link, we’ll send you tips on how to unlock your hidden treasure of potential.

Better Advice

Experts Advice on Self Help and Self-Improvement

Orestis Spanos

Written by

I’m an upcoming dentist. I love writing about the psychology of confidence. I also enjoy approaching life in a philosophical but still logical way.

Better Advice

Opinions about life, self-Improvement, personal growth and valuable life lessons. Humans need motivational spark and illumination to strength moral ascent. For that you need better advice.

Orestis Spanos

Written by

I’m an upcoming dentist. I love writing about the psychology of confidence. I also enjoy approaching life in a philosophical but still logical way.

Better Advice

Opinions about life, self-Improvement, personal growth and valuable life lessons. Humans need motivational spark and illumination to strength moral ascent. For that you need better advice.

Medium is an open platform where 170 million readers come to find insightful and dynamic thinking. Here, expert and undiscovered voices alike dive into the heart of any topic and bring new ideas to the surface. Learn more

Follow the writers, publications, and topics that matter to you, and you’ll see them on your homepage and in your inbox. Explore

If you have a story to tell, knowledge to share, or a perspective to offer — welcome home. It’s easy and free to post your thinking on any topic. Write on Medium

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store