The Most Influential Leaders Don’t Need Charisma (But They Do Need Authenticity)
Here’s why the most effective leaders are true to themselves rather than attention-seeking divas.
Modern media values extravagance over effectiveness. We, as a distraction-hungry collective focused on instant gratification and over-stimulation, gravitate towards individuals that do and say outrageous things.
Often, the loudest individuals, brazen with bravado and lacking in critical thinking, tend to generate a palpable buzz online. This friction-based humming creates views, clicks and revenue for publications and news outlets, meaning that controversy increases profits.
But there’s big difference between charisma and leadership.
Charisma sells. It’s loud, but empty nevertheless.
It, along with glamour and excessive self-indulgence, appeals to a wide range of people struggling to find happiness in a chaotic and stressful world. Because when you’re trapped in a maze with no end in sight, little moments of distraction create a sense of relief from the pain and suffering of your limited and frustrated existence.
True leadership is often quiet. It does not need to sell — its value is palpable, immediate, and direct.
A true leader doesn’t need to be the loudest person in the room. Nor do they need to make controversy through outlandish behavior. In fact, a real leader knows that engaging in this behavior divides teams and detracts from the processes that lead to action towards a collective goal. Drawing unnecessary attention to oneself is a childish desire to feel powerful — a clear ego-based compensation to avoid the feelings of inadequacy buried beneath one’s awareness.
The best and most effective leaders either do not possess this wound or, more often, are aware of their challenges and limitations, and take actions to address them so they avoid acting them out in their company. Because these individuals pride themselves on organizational effectiveness more than constant attention.
These real leaders — the ones that motivate and inspire others — do so through congruence.
They do what they say, practice what they preach, and allow their palpable presence to do the talking for them.
An authentic leader listens and creates space for the thoughts, feelings, and opinions of others to be heard. They develop a culture of openness, disagreement, and collaboration. In short, they put people first rather than themselves.
These leaders understand that the best companies — the ones making an impact — do so through collaboration. There is no one mastermind creating everything in isolation. Instead, teams of diverse individuals work together to iron out a vision that can change the world.
Therefore, a leader cannot and must not be a distraction. They must become a facilitator — someone that empowers others to perform their best, even if that means suspending their thoughts and feelings to create a teaching moment.
As a former musician, I like to think about it like this: a real leader is not a solo artist. They certainly have talent and, at times, proudly stand out front of an orchestra and share their gifts with the audience. But more often, real leaders are conductors. They build cohesion, orchestrate emotion, and keep the entire operation moving smoothly.
Have you watched a maestro conductor?
Their hands glide through the air in a magnificent display of grace, while their bodies resonate with the vibration of the entire orchestra. They become a vehicle through which the music flows and connects with everyone in the auditorium. It’s almost as if they disappear and there is only the moment of creation — the music itself.
That’s what a true leader does.
They become one with their team to such an extent that they almost disappear. Almost. Their presence is still palpable throughout each layer of the organization, they worked with each team, but they are not banging symbols demanding attention.
Much like a conductor, the art of leadership has to do with keeping a cadence and rhythm for others to follow.
The effective leader must know when and how to intervene. They must, through wisdom and intuition, impose just enough structure to keep everything afloat without getting in the way.
Keeping the focus on everyone else — the musicians — allows for the creation of something transcendent: the music, which becomes far more powerful than any one voice, instrument, or melodic line.
That’s why you, as a leader, must realize that your role is that of a conductor, not a solo artist.
The important title that you hold isn’t for your glorification, but for the betterment of your company. And part of improving your company involves getting out of the way and encouraging your employees to do what they do best.
While the rest of society asks you for interviews, praises your leadership abilities, and turns you into an influencer, you must keep that separate from your business. You must continue treating others with compassion and honesty, knowing that your role is to facilitate, not distract. Because the moment you walk in acting like you are better than your employees is the moment you lose them.
Demanding that you be the center of attention takes away from the collaborative process. It makes people feel like they need to treat you differently because your role. And over time, it teaches them to treat you like a title instead of a person.
For a leader that values growth, being treated like a title is terrible.
People become afraid to give you feedback, tell you the truth, and ask questions. They are so afraid of being perceived as incompetent that they pretend to know what they’re doing when they don’t. And all of those issues make your job far more difficult than it needs to be.
Don’t waste time, energy, and effort trying to undo a toxic environment when you can avoid constructing it in the first place.
Get out of your own way, stay true to yourself, and remember that the most influential leaders aren’t loud.
The great leaders embody their values and facilitate the creation of a beautiful group process that allows everyone to contribute.
(A previous version of this article first appeared in Inc Magazine)
