Better Humans

Better Humans is one of the largest and oldest Medium’s publications on self-improvement and personal development. Our goal is to bring you the world’s most helpful writing on human potential.

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The Sixth Love Language Cannot be Found, Only Created

Secrets to building the most underrated love language

May Pang
Better Humans
Published in
10 min readNov 6, 2023

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A couple kissing on the street. The colorful filter of the world is projected onto the landscape directly behind them while the buildings further out are drab and gray.
Created by the author on Midjourney

Whenever I reflect on the success of my current relationship, no one is more surprised by it than me.

The relationship was everything I wanted, but it just didn’t show up the way I thought it would.

Sure, he is attractive, smart, funny, and loving. But the start of our relationship was missing all the hallmarks of true love that Hollywood told me to look out for. We didn’t have the can’t-stop-thinking-about-you infatuation, nor did we want to spend every waking minute together. There were no extravagant romantic gestures or declarations of undying love.

At least back then. But all those things are true today.

As a serial monogamist my entire adult life, I had always looked for the instantaneous chemistry that I thought would be the cue to “The One.” And I had experienced it many times over. Each time, it was more deliciously blissful than the last.

But chemistry and lust were only ever the promise of love, never the sustainment of love itself — even when both parties deeply believed in it at the time.

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Better Humans
Better Humans

Published in Better Humans

Better Humans is one of the largest and oldest Medium’s publications on self-improvement and personal development. Our goal is to bring you the world’s most helpful writing on human potential.

May Pang
May Pang

Written by May Pang

Combining Storytelling with Science. Communication & Connection Coach. Would love to hear from you!💗may@mojomint.com 💙 www.mojomint.com. Based in Boulder, CO.

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