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Why Successful People Choose Self-Compassion Over Self-Esteem

Self-compassion isn’t about letting yourself off the hook. It’s about having a growth mindset that gives you authentic confidence.

Melody Wilding, LMSW
Better Humans
8 min readMay 15, 2018

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Credit: Artem Bali via Pexels (link)

For the past six years, I’ve been obsessed with the topic of confidence — how to get it, how to raise it, and how to keep it. My preoccupation grew out of fierce battles with insecurity while growing up, and out of learning to navigate life as a highly sensitive person who feels everything more intensely.

My obsession really took hold when I noticed a strikingly similar pattern among my coaching clients. Smart and highly accomplished people, they also had thoughts like:

“I’m falling behind in my career.”

“No matter how much I do, it’s never enough.”

“I want to start a business, but I fear looking foolish.”

Anyone who has tried to embark on a professional or personal goal is familiar with this voice of the inner critic — the one that says things like “you’re not good enough,” “this is a stupid idea,” or “nothing will ever work out.”

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Better Humans
Better Humans

Published in Better Humans

Better Humans is one of the largest and oldest Medium’s publications on self-improvement and personal development. Our goal is to bring you the world’s most helpful writing on human potential.

Melody Wilding, LMSW
Melody Wilding, LMSW

Written by Melody Wilding, LMSW

Author of TRUST YOURSELF. Executive coach to Sensitive Strivers. Human behavior professor. Featured in NYT, NBC, CNN. https://melodywilding.com/book

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