Trust Yourself First
In a complex world full of miscommunication and isolation — trust doesn’t come easy.
“Don’t worry, trust me. I got this.” A statement we would’ve used quite frequently, whether to infuse strength into a crumbling relationship or to reassure a boss about our capabilities. But do we really trust ourselves when we say this? Or is it an empty underlining of an ability we seriously lack?
In a complex world full of miscommunication, confusion and isolation — trust doesn’t come easy.
Why have faith when it’s easier to doubt?
Losing personal and professional relationships in the black hole of ‘lack of trust’ is quite easy. Haven’t you had those second thoughts where you feel that you may have taken something or someone for granted? Or where someone misused the trust you placed in them? Or that dark abyss when you felt that you could never trust anyone no matter what situation may arise? In such moments, our brains automatically go into a negative spiral and doubts spring out of the most unlikely corners of our imagination, harming us in ways we cannot fathom.
Although some may argue trust is a function of time and comfort, one key ingredient is also confidence in ourselves. Self-confidence is key to building any trust-worthy relationship and also of assuring others about yourselves. The moment you start to self-doubt, your promise of trust also begins to waver. Especially when things don’t go our way — we ponder and question ourselves and subject ourselves to the harshest criticism. So before we offer our trust to others, I believe we should reflect on our ability to trust our own selves.
Trusting yourself is a practice in self-love
In an address at Stanford University in 2005, Apple co-founder Steve Jobs had said, “You have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.”
It’s vital to trust your instinct and go with what your intuition is telling you. Whenever you hear that niggling voice in your brain saying that you did something wrong or missed doing something, keep your doubts aside and trust yourself. It’s no less than practicing self-love — and of course, we all know the power of the subconscious mind and manifesting good thoughts.
Rick Hanson, PhD and professional psychologist, quoted the eight stages of human development by Erik Erikson and said that the first, foundational stage is about “basic trust.” Erikson analysed the importance of trust or mistrust of the outer world and the people in it. Henson said that what usually looks like “the world is untrustworthy” actually means “I don’t trust myself to deal with it.”
TLDR: Trust yourself a bit more! There is always a chance that you could go wrong — but in that moment, you did the right thing.
As Bob Dylan summarises in his song from 1985:
Well, you’re on your own, you always were
In a land of wolves and thieves
Don’t put your hope in ungodly man
Or be a slave to what somebody else believes
Trust yourself
And you won’t be disappointed when vain people let you down
Trust yourself
And look not for answers where no answers can be found
