I’m Not Trying To Change Myself In 2021 And That Needs To Be Okay

The only regret in life is to keep regretting the choices I’ve made

Alice Vuong
Beyond Fear
Published in
5 min readDec 30, 2020

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Image by Engin Akyurt from Pixabay

Every year, I make big goals for myself for the upcoming year. The two biggest ones that get carried forward year after year are:

Learn Spanish. Make enough money from my writing to (have the option) quit my job.

And every year, I fail terribly and I beat myself up for it. The truth is, I don’t put as much effort as I should into achieving these goals so I shouldn’t be shocked when I don’t achieve the results I want.

This year, I don’t have any big plans to change myself or to change anything about me. I’m sick of disappointing myself year after year. And after the year we, as in the entire world, had, I’ve decided that 2021 will be a year of refocus and gratitude.

That doesn’t mean I’m giving up. It means I’m going to be grateful for what I have and let some things go. Sometimes the best thing to recenter yourself is to let things go.

It’s okay to be satisfied with your life as it is now

My house is a complete mess most of the time, there’s very little room to move up at my job and we’ve had a pay freeze for the last 5 years. I have a son, who unfortunately takes after his mother, and is stubborn as hell, and my writing isn’t exactly making waves or money.

And you know what?

I’m still happy and satisfied with my life.

I have an awesome husband who makes me laugh, my son is as cute as a button so that (partially) offsets him drawing on the floors. My coworkers and boss are supportive, I love knowing I can afford things that I want, and I like my memory foam mattress and pillows.

This is the life I created and I’m happy with it.

There is always talk about a better person and creating a life you love but nobody relishes the joy of simply being satisfied and happy with the life you built for yourself.

I love my comfort zone

My life is not at the edge of my comfort zone much to the despair of the gurus and influencers who preach…

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