LET’S GET REAL
No One Has Their Sh*t Together
And why I don’t plan on getting mine together anytime soon
I’m sure everyone recognizes this feeling: your life looks like a mess. You’re behind on your work, you aren’t reaching your goals, the days seem to disappear before your eyes, and you’re just totally and utterly dissatisfied with your life.
Then you open up the news or your Instagram or your LinkedIn and you’re bombarded with people talking about their new internships, the next child prodigy going to university, or how everyone is now a lean, mean, pescetarian, productivity machine.
You sit there and think, Ugh, why am I like this? Why can’t I get my sh*t together? Why does everyone else have their sh*t together?
The truth is… they don’t. Or, at least 99.9999% of them don’t.
Let me explain.
Four years ago, I was like any other try-hard high school freshman. I signed up for an abnormal number of clubs and admired all of the seniors who were either club heads or involved in elite entrepreneurship programs or running conferences.
And as the wide-eyed youngster who sat there watching or following their lead, I always thought that, well, you know, in order for them to have gotten to those places, clearly they’re absolute gods and know what to do, how to do it, and exactly who they are!
But more importantly, all I could think at the time was wow — if I were like that… I’d have my sh*t together. My life would be COMPLETE, I would be living life like a BOSS.
Four years later, as a try-hard high school senior that is now one of those club heads, entrepreneurship program participants and organization runners… guess what?
I still don’t have my sh*t together.
You heard me right. I still don’t have my sh*t together.
I applied or joined these positions because I thought they were cool, because they would look good on a resume, or sometimes just because my friend needed another person. I thought that if I was accepted, surely I was either already fully prepared for this or someone was going to teach me “the way.”
Nu-uh.
I didn’t know how to manage a team, I didn’t know how to run meetings or teach lessons or whatever else I was being told to handle. I was running around trying my best to figure things out as I went… and that’s exactly the point: You sort of never have your sh*t together.
And you might be thinking, What the hell? So we just go through our entire lives frantically not having our lives together and constantly feeling dissatisfied?
No. You don’t.
You learn to be comfortable with not having your sh*t together.
You have to realize that nobody has their life together, and that’s the way it sort of should be.
Think about it. The concept of not having your sh*t together means you don’t really know what to do. And the reason you’re not reaching the amazing goals you have is because you’re in unfamiliar territory and/or you have a lot of work to do.
But this is bound to happen as you grow and take on bigger and more difficult challenges, because you’re encountering problems that you’ve never dealt with before.
If every problem was simple to solve off the bat, not only would that be unbelievably boring, there probably wouldn’t be any problems left for anyone to solve in this world and everyone would have their sh*t together. But that’s clearly not the case.
I think there’s only three types of people who “have their sh*t together”:
- People who stagnate and get good at doing something and don’t actively challenge themselves to do more and be more
- People who think that they know everything and anything but really don’t
- People who have accepted and are at peace with not having their sh*t together.
And frankly, I think it’s much better to be someone who feels like they “don’t have their sh*t together” than to be the first two — because that means you at least acknowledge that you have work to do. Or alternatively, it means you’re actively pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone.
Both facts mean you are on the path to growth. It’s only by recognizing problems that you can solve them, and it’s only by taking on new challenges that you can evolve.
And if you fall into the first two categories… that’s okay! Maybe you’re totally happy with where you are in life and that’s awesome, live the lifestyle you want man and keep doing what you’re doing. Or maybe you aren’t and now you feel like you don’t have your sh*t together, in which case — I’ve done my job. Now it’s time for you to get comfortable with that feeling, and search for it.
No matter how high of a ranking you attain or how old you get, you’re constantly going to be faced with new challenges, which means you and everyone else on this planet will NEVER have your sh*t together.
That is to say, there is no concrete finish line or trophy you can obtain that will magically guarantee you the title or feeling of “having your sh*t together.”
This means that the best thing you can do for yourself is to accept that. Accept that feeling of discomfort. Accept the fact that you don’t know what to do or that there’s so much to fix.
In fact, I challenge you to SEEK IT OUT.
Why? Because it means you’re growing and pushing yourself to your limits. You’re becoming a better person each and every day.
That’s why I’m proud to say: I don’t have my shit together, and I don’t plan on it any time soon.
Thanks for reading! Want to read more from me?
- Stop Reading & Start Thinking
- 4 Design Principles to Live By
- STEM Is Not the Only Way to Be Smart
- Searching for Certainty won’t Lead You to the Truth — Maybe
