You Know You Actually Don’t Need Unique New York
and Other American English Language Myths Debunked
You know you need unique New York.
You know, you actually don’t. Most of the world is doing just fine on its own.
Showing my work:
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
Most pet stores will not allow you to trade-in birds. I’ve done my research.
Misery loves company.
Sometimes, he doesn’t mind a night alone with just a good book & box wine.
He who laughs last laughs best.
Or… he’s just overcompensating because the joke flew way over his head.
Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair.
You might want to check Urban Dictionary on that one.
Carry the weight of the world on your shoulders.
Not even the casts of “The Golden Girls,” “Designing Women” and “Dynasty” combined had enough padding for this:
It’s a small world.
Are you not reading this? Look right up there ⇧.
The grass is always greener on the other side.
My neighbor spends far more time on his yard and I honestly can’t tell the difference.
Kill two birds with one stone.
If you need to “optimize” your animal cruelty, it might be time to try therapy.
Head over heels in love.
So you are pretty much just standing normally. This is not a compliment.
I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream.
If you mean because of lactose intolerance, that’s very likely:
Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.
You are much better off just leaving them in the carton.
Fly by the seat of your pants.
Not a viable option according to FAA regulations. Also, the FAA really doesn’t appreciate when you call them to ask about this.
I heard it through the grapevine.
You can’t hear this way. But the coverage map is still better than Boost Mobile.
Curiosity killed the cat.
It definitely was NOT that I wasn’t looking while jamming to Demi Lovato’s “Sorry Not Sorry.”
Happy as a clam.
This is quite accurate. There isn’t a clam alive who is not just sickeningly jolly.
More by Ernio?⬇︎
Disclaimers: I ♡ New York and no animals were harmed in the writing of this story. But, Demi Lovato does kill it on “Sorry Not Sorry,” amirite?
