If a Woman’s Worth Is Linked to Her Fertility, What Happens When She Turns 40?
The low-key tyranny of aging beyond our fertile years
When you’re struggling to conceive, turning 40 sounds like just about the worst thing that can happen to you.
I started to try for a kid at 36 with no luck. As my 40th birthday got closer, I began to catastrophise. It felt like a big cut-off point. Having children could happen after 40, but it probably wouldn’t. It would have to be a damn miracle.
For women, there is a low-key tyranny that comes with turning 40. We know that societally speaking, our worth diminishes as we age. And we know that if we want kids but don’t have them by the time our fourth decade rolls around, our chances of conceiving are in the gutter.
As I edged towards 40, I felt all of this. The pressure. The fertility cut-off. The stress.
I’m on the other side of 40 now. And with that, I’ve decided I don’t want to spend the second half of my life defined by my age, my reproductive status, and what both of those mean for my societal worth.
Because like all women, I will continue to age. And it turns out my fertility went bye-bye many years ago.
