Member-only story
How I Went from Complaining to Taking Control
And what gratitude has done to change my life
Five years ago, I used to be someone who complained about life and blamed others for my problems. It wasn’t that I wouldn’t take responsibility for my choices, it was more that I had a victim mindset.
My childhood wasn’t ideal. I endured trauma for the first several years of my life and then lived in an oppressive home after I was adopted. My father believed in discipline by the belt, and he often put me down.
By the time I became an adult it was easier to blame my misery on what had been happening around me rather than to take control.
It wasn’t until I became a parent the second time that I began to truly evaluate my mindset. No, I couldn’t help what happened to me, but I could certainly ensure it didn’t happen to my children. I could make sure my life was put together enough for them to thrive.
I was a teacher and trying to be the best parent I could be, but I was still miserable. I was one step from falling apart at any given moment because of how I was living at home.
Life with two small children and a full time job was wearing on me. I felt alone in my marriage and alone in parenting. Still, I refused to see my part in all the turmoil.