Removing Alcohol Radically Changed My Life
In less than two years
Before 2022, I thought about removing alcohol often. I felt better when I didn’t drink. However, alcohol was something I did socially. I couldn’t imagine I could or would ever remove it. In fact, I believed you had to be an alcoholic to stop drinking. I painted a picture of why you would stop drinking, and it didn’t seem to match what I did. I didn’t drink daily, I had a good job, and things seemed to be going well. What I didn’t know then, I looked forward to my weekend drink because other parts of my life were dull. I was unfulfilled and didn’t know it. I was out of touch with who I could become without alcohol. I thought every normal adult drank and had to stop if they had a bad problem with drinking.
I suppressed my needs and had a hard time truly expressing myself. The thoughts I have about removing alcohol were my higher self telling me this. I just didn’t understand any of it. I didn’t understand intuition. I remember thinking to myself that I wanted to stop drinking, but I often thought about not drinking a lot. I would tell myself to drink water and try to moderate, but it often never worked. The best thing for me was to remove alcohol.
In 2022, I finally wanted to do something about alcohol. If I were honest, alcohol was very unpredictable. It made me an emotional mess sometimes; I’ve blacked out, not taken care of myself, got angry at myself, and stole hours of my time. Alcohol was sold in a package of lies. It didn’t really make things more fun. I gave alcohol so much power and none to myself. In January 2022, I decided to take a break and knew I never wanted to drink again.
Like many people who remove alcohol, it takes time and doesn’t always happen on the first try. I found out that I was a people pleaser. Awareness is key to changing ourselves. Without it, we’ll keep doing the same nonproductive habit. I drank again after 6 months. I tried to stop drinking with no support. I was a binge social drinker, and it was hard to remove alcohol. Everyone did it, and I felt like I was missing out. It took time to re-wire this thought, get support, and commit to sobriety. The less I drank, the more I felt the effect of alcohol, and it did nothing for me. I traded in a few hours for several hours of regrets. On Nov 2022, I quit forever. When I decided to stop drinking and was taking a walk, I heard myself say, “doors will open if you stop drinking alcohol.” It was wild, and I knew this was my intuition that was confirming my decision.
After I got support and felt more confident in my sober journey, I joined a coaching certificate program. During this process, I started a business in 2023. I didn’t know much about business. What I did know, my current job wasn’t likely something I wanted to stay in forever. Once I stopped drinking, I began to become more honest with myself. I wanted to do something that lit me up. Once I went forward with my business, I saw all my limiting beliefs come up.
In the past, I would quit things when they got hard so I didn’t fail. I also tied a lot of success to my worth. Although none of this began because of alcohol, it was easy not to do growth activities or push myself and just drink on the weekends. I was disconnected from myself. I felt very uncomfortable once I stopped drinking. I wanted these feelings to go away and sink into my comfort zone. I even thought at one point that sobriety wasn’t worth it. Do I really want this? I decided to go forward with being alcohol-free, coaching, and even writing three children’s books. I published two of the books. I kept thinking about what doors would open.
Something always felt off. As I worked on feeling worthy of the things I deeply wanted in my life, I wanted to make more money. I read all the books and courses on money mindset. Nothing worked. I had a fear of getting money and spending it. I told my husband I wanted us to work closely on cash together, but that never happened. If I kept working harder, I could do this coaching thing. However, it burned me out, and I wanted to quit again.
I kept going, and through all this, I learned that we often quit before things get better. Sometimes, we must learn a lesson to move forward. I wasn’t bad at money or business; I was still holding back. I’ve helped several women and found my way in the coaching space. If anything, I love talking about how sobriety and my outlook on life changed me for the better.
In 2024, my husband and I felt disconnected. If I were honest, I felt like my husband had a problem with alcohol. However, I thought I couldn’t tell someone what to do, so I was passive-aggressive and often didn’t feel as happy as I would have liked. In fact, I would convince myself things were fine. He also told me he was fine, and I believed in him, despite my body telling me something different. I stopped listening to my intuition because I didn’t want to think my husband had a problem. I couldn’t take much more and said something to him. I couldn’t tell him what to do, but I could tell him what I couldn’t tolerate and that my happiness was important.
My husband admitted to me his problem with alcohol. I was scared. As I write this, I’m not sure how this will all turn out. We are getting therapy, and he plans to get support. What I do know is that I’m thankful for my sobriety. I believe I was led on this path to work on myself and help those closest to me. It’s been the most eye-opening few years and the most fulfilling. There’s been pain, but in pain comes growth.
I started a podcast, Soulful and Sober. Where I find my zone of genius is educating others and public speaking. I never thought I would become an author or have a social media account where I share publicly my struggles and wins. I decided to quit drinking to feel better, but I gained my purpose and strengthened my spirituality. Sobriety was how I started my healing journey and finding out who I was meant to become. I’ll always be thankful for listening to myself and going alcohol-free.
