How to Take the Sting Out of Rejections
4 professional writers on how to reframe, rework, rebound, and carry on
Being a writer — or any artist or performer — has challenges that many other occupations don’t have. Our work is rejected by editors, is criticized and trashed by readers, and sometimes, just vanishes into oblivion. Some rejections sting, some stab, some eviscerate us, most suck.
Research shows that the pain of rejection activates the same areas of the brain as physical pain does, and we respond accordingly. It also triggers primitive fears of being ostracized from our tribe.
The tribe was necessary for security, support, companionship. It was a dangerous world out there, and the odds of surviving without the tribe were grim. While we no longer have to rely on a tribe for safety and survival, rejection still stirs those early fears of being abandoned and alone. Yet, we keep creating and putting ourselves out there where we can be rejected. After more than 20 years as a professional, full-time writer, I’ve collected a fair share of rejections; I still cringe when one drops into my inbox, but I’ve learned how to reframe, rework, and rebound from them.
