Trying On Alter Egos
“Who are you?” is far less interesting than “Who do you want to be?”
Who you are might be nice, but what lights me up is to know where you’re aiming — that tension between the current you and the future you.
The fastest way I’ve found to transport myself between the two realities is with the help of alter egos — they temporarily allow me to slide into the new skin of who I’d like to be.
Alter Egos are fun. Or boring. Or quiet. Or loud. But the best thing about alter egos is that they aren’t entirely you. Not 100% anyways.
And that’s why I like them — it gives me permission to play dress-up with reality.
Today I’m a genius writer who can strike out thought-provoking gold in 30 minutes. Tomorrow I’m a domestic saint, bringing warmth and light to all with my delicious homemade meals. Thursday I’m a wealthy Italian heiress who spends all her time on the ski slopes, mostly watching others.
Some days my alter egos are more apparent — other times more subtle, a sweet secret I keep hidden under my tongue. Sometimes close friends notice a slight shift, other times they don’t.
The one thing that held me back at first? My hesitancy to embrace them. Only after fully adopting the alter ego could I start to witness the transformative power of stepping into something slightly outside of myself. I also found effective alter egos don’t need to be my complete opposite, but just different enough to make me reconsider who I am that day.
My alter ego closet is full of metaphorical outfits. Some I wear more than others. The “motivated, hard working professional” suit probably needs to be taken in for dry cleaning quite honestly, so I can remember to put on my “laid back surfer” suit.
But while these different versions say something about who I’m trying to become, it also says something about who I am right now. The outfits that are worn out from frequent use show what direction I’m hoping to move myself. The alter egos that fit too tight suggest that I need to re-evaluate and update them to suit me for who I am now.
With all these outfits, one might think that you can lose yourself.
But it’s only after you get lost that you can truly allow yourself to be found.
