Are you signing up for honeymoon membership or a lifetime?
I met some kind, generous and loving souls who didn’t give up on their wish and desire of finding a soulmate. The pain and suffering from the past relationship could not dishearten them. Although they looked terrified of losing balance and opening up the heart, they didn’t say no to the next one.
My friend, Meeta mentioned that profound and harmonious connection might be a theoretical aspect for those who believe in the supremacy of peace and contentment. Romance,deep-attachment is challenging and messy.
She adds, love challenges, trigger insecurities and highlight all the gloomy corners of our soul. When we carefully look at these dark angles, we either get engulfed by self-pity or self- sabotaging, but once again; we strive for healing in another soul.
I may sound like a pessimist, but my observation says-
People having incomplete and disdainful closures in love centric relationship, often look forward to another real beginning. Presumably, they seek healing in another bond, even after acknowledging the limitations of the human mind. Now, this is a wake-up call. Another relationship doesn’t guarantee peace and compatibility; it surely serves as an escape route to bypass discomfort but who comprehends the relationship future in the commencement stage?
I learned, a woman knows exactly when a man vacant a particular corner in her heart, that miraculous moment when her heart stops racing for him. The nanosecond, when he demonstrated the first withdrawal symptom, gets registered in her memory bank. Similarly, a man can’t demolish the hour when his beloved expunged the poetic language of emotions and interrogated him with -what lies in the loop of their destiny?
There is nothing romantic about incomplete courtships; it’s a connection that does not grow stronger with time. Such relationships often trigger insecurity issues.
And the question emerges- why do Men and Women look for love, comfort and affection? (Can’t they accept, that certain happenings in life are, beyond human control)?
Yes, it’s destiny.
My First Answer to my question is- Because they want to.
Yes, embracing the uniqueness of each relationship, they find their answers. Assuming that the lesson learned about themselves, from yesteryear’s about their emotional needs and expectations from the partner, they can dive.
Do you agree with my assumption?
Yes. I am glad. In case you disagree, let me know the answer in the comment section. I would love to hear from you.
Secondly, they do not want to live with regret. The lament of not giving themselves another fair opportunity( to cherish the moments of togetherness and love); would be unfair.
What if I get a compatible partner and what if it doesn’t work, the brainstorming sessions generate millions of thoughts, arising from the first breakup to the last one. Concluding-” love is the driving force of life”.
When the Quest of being loved continues, the pain persists.
When I see my friends in this situation, I habitually ask -
Who said love is the driving force of life?
Who taught you this?
When did it work as a driving force in your life?
What if you don’t need any driving force that sucks the residues of trust and hope from life.
They don’t even listen to me, as like love, I can not give them the morphine dose of delirium. They enjoy the honeymoon period, keeping my calls on hold and replying to my texts in a few words to plunge into the newness of love. Autumn, Winters, Summer, Then it Rains. And, the romance disappears; reality surfaces up, the chemistry creates an imbalance, and the same saga of disappointment continues.
No. I am not suggesting that the woman or man should stop believing in the eternity of a relationship or must not embark on a new journey of finding a compatible partner.
I am making an effort to be someone’s voice.
Dear anonymous man or woman I hear you, it happens. It will happen. Not every relationship turns into a relationship status. Not every “I love you” is a commitment. It might be a momentary feeling that might grow stronger or fade over a while.
Flowers bloom each day. And we remember only the blooming phenomena, as it’s fresh and soul-soothing, positive and magnificent.But.What about the withering process. Yes, it’s not positive, gorgeous; that’s real. As real as blooming is.
As long as you try and fail, you would evolve, get transformed, experience awkwardness in love. But ask yourself-Does it happen authentically? True love is a mystic concept, often relative.
Should we chase or wait for this true love or start living without any quest.
What’s the purpose of living? To be happy and calm or to be in love and anxious. Both are choices. Relationship will have its phases and seasons, probability of not getting along with some would be equal to a life long honeymoon phase.
If you take it as your choice and decision to give yourself another fair chance,
Do ask yourself-Are you signing up for honeymoon membership or a lifetime!
The choice is always your’s.
Thanks,
Shweta.
