Journey
As the wind rustled the leaves, the blanket of clouds thickened. From the open living room window, a gust of wind tickled Sadia’s lavender scarf, blooming a smile on her face. ‘Alhumdulilah (all praise and thanks belongs to God) for the ability to feel this mercy of Yours after days of heat’, she thought. The clamor of children broke her train of thoughts as they poured into the living room. Their parents were steps behind, greeting Sadia’s mother, the host of the night. Getting off the sofa, Sadia advanced towards her mother. Her eyes dilated as she saw the ones who had arrived: her cousin, Maha, along with her husband, Asad, and two toddlers.
Plastering a smile on, she greeted “Assalam-u-Alikum (may peace be upon you) Maha.”
As Maha turned to her, Sadia’s smile wavered as Maha scanned her from top to bottom before replying, “Walakum Assalam (And peace be upon you) Sadia. Didn’t know that khala’s (aunt’s) house has turned into a masjid (mosque).”
Gulping the bile rising in her throat, Sadia replied calmly, “The entire earth is a masjid (mosque), dear cousin.” With a smirk, she spun on her heels and headed to the kitchen to dinner.
The house was bustling with life once all the guests had arrived. The dinner table was littered with a variety of food that Naveen and her mother had spent the past day preparing. As she poured herself some apple juice, Sadia could feel the burning gaze of someone. Looking up, she found none other than Maha and Asad throwing dagger at her with their gaze. Instead of letting her nerves take over, she grinned. As she did, she could see the rage visible in Maha’s black orbs.
Once dessert was served and savored, the guests left, one by one. Picking up the bowls and spoons with her sister, Sadia busied herself to avoid encountering the couple. Stilettos echoed against the tiled floor, causing Sadia to lift her gaze. Groaning internally, she stood up straight as she came face to face with the person she was trying to dodge: Maha. From the open door, Sadia saw lightning strike but it could not match the rage in her cousin’s eyes.
“You have changed from last time, Sadia. Daring or arrogant, I don’t know which one though.” Maha spat.
Taking a step forward, Sadia replied “To follow the truth one needs to be daring Maha. With courage, one cannot walk this path.”
Flaring her nostrils, she snapped, “You and your seemingly big words would get you nowhere. One day everyone would witness your arrogance, which will be soon.” With that she stomped out of the main door, leaving Sadia standing as still as a statue.
“I knew it was a wrong decision to invite her. It’s all my fault.” Her mother said, keeping a hand on Sadia’s face gently.
“It is not your fault, mama. You invited her out of the goodness of your heart, thinking she had changed. But her poison had only increased over time.” Flashing an assuring smile, she took her mother’s hand in hers.
Once the lights were off and all the members of the family were in the embrace of their beds, Sadia fished her journal from her drawer. Against the clap of thunder, she poured her heart out. She wrote ‘Allah (God) made humans out of clay so that despite being stubborn, he can be molded. Molded into someone who can break free from the chains of shaitan (devil) and submit to Allah (God) alone. For the past six years, I have been dealing with those who refuse to be molded by the guidance of their Creator.
These people turn into weapons of shaitan (devil), attacking when they see someone Moulded. Initially, I used to cower from their words, which were like arrows. Taking refuge in my room, I would calm my burning heart by shedding tears. As time progressed, Allah (God) trained me to stand firm and not let anyone tear me apart. I was taught by Him to defend myself before anyone else. Most of all, I was taught to place my trust in Him who had guided me from the depths of darkness to light.
So standing up to Maha was not wrong, rather completely correct. I was not rude and enraged like her rather I stood up for myself instead of allowing her to stomp over me, as I had in past. Her hate stems from me practicing the deen (religion) we were both born and raised upon, hence her hate and behavior both are baseless and utterly stupid. In my heart, I don’t hate her rather feel sad that she hasn’t experienced the sweetness of Islam yet. Even though I stand up to her, I still pray for her as she is my cousin, someone I share beautiful memories of childhood with.
Oh Allah, (God) guide her to You. Illuminate her heart with Your light and expel all darkness from it. Guide me, oh Allah (God), for with it I am lost. Protect me from arrogance of any sort. Do not leave me on my own, even in the blink of an eye. Ameen.’
As a tear-stained the paper, Sadia closed her eyes, basking in the moment. Her heart was full with contentment and serenity, for which she could trade anything on the face of this world.
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Maryam Merchant Shaista Malik Shaista Hassan Shah Sumera Rizwan Aylin Alimirzaei Dingil Omnia Mohamed Benny Lim Dr Mehmet Yildiz Dr. Fatima Imam Donna L Roberts, PhD (Psych Pstuff) EP McKnight, MEd Marjorie Dadhich
