Tearing My Heart Open Once More Today
Just some thoughts
How do I explain the way I am to others? I won’t lie I find this difficult. That's one reason I take to writing. It’s a way to show others the inside of me. It’s a way to command my vulnerable yet fierce spirit to the surface and offer it as a gift or curse to the world.
Because we all need to be seen in one way or the other. We all need to be loved, and being seen and understood or held by others is one way for us to feel loved.
Maybe that is why writers write, poets write poems, and dancers dance. The creative act is a means to feel witnessed, loved, and safe in this heavy and sometimes bleak world
The same yearning to be seen, safe and held that a newborn baby has, seeps into our adult lives.
I feel I have to show micro fragments of my heart to the world on a daily. That way I remain balanced, sane, and in touch with the pulse of life running through me.
I have to admit some days it’s hard. It’s hard to be bothered to show myself to others. I ask myself who cares? I mean is the world not ruled by greed and money, and all the insane busyness of modern life?
Then I remember that we have hearts beating inside all of us. And these hearts hold a depth of emotion. And within this emotional landscape, there will always be awe, wonder, and curiosity. There will always be people who want to see others and who want to hold space for them in their lives. Because I am one of these people, and I’m guessing there are others too.
I guess in my writing I am writing nothing and everything at the same time. I am describing the need to tear my heart open and share the threads of it with the world.
It’s a creative pain I live with on a daily. It’s also my cross to bear being a highly sensitive human. Anyway, I’ll leave my thoughts on this path today,
Once again I’ve shared a fragment of my heart with strangers. But even I know it’s not about any of you. But all about my need for healing, expression and wholeness.
