6 Lessons I Learned from Living 9 Years in the United States
#1 — Respect Everyone
I came to the United States in 2002 to attend college at the University of Maryland.
To say that I loved the US is an understatement. I loved everything about America. I had a painful college experience in India, I had just committed social suicide by quitting college.
America felt like heaven.
Places were clean. People followed rules. People respected one another. Interacting with people was pleasant.
I was mesmerized.
I decided that I would never return back to India. 9 years later, I learned to never say never. I returned back home in 2011 of my own volition. My supervisor, who loved my work, was sad to see me go. Why I decided to green pastures of America and return home to India is a story for another time.
I took back rich lessons from the United States — lessons I will be eternally grateful for.
Here are 6 lessons I learned from the United States of America.
1 — Respect Everyone
In the USA, I saw:
- Adults respecting the views of children
- Everyone being treated with respect regardless of their job description
- Supervisors treating subordinates with respect.
Everyone is worthy of respect.
I took this lesson to heart, and do my best to treat everyone I meet with respect.
2 — Process is Key
In the US, be it traffic rules, application to colleges, the way a company operates, even the way athletes play sports — is all process-oriented.
When processes are not in place, people wing it for the large part. The problem with winging it is that when things go awry, it is not clear whose fault it is and the blame gets passed from pillar to post.
Processes and definitions are crucial to measure results and correct courses when results are falling short.
“Follow the process” is a mantra by which you can’t go wrong.
3 — It’s Okay to Greet Strangers on the Street
It’s very normal in the United States to greet a total stranger with a “How’re you doing” and a smile.
Greeting strangers in India brings a startled reaction, and they start to think, “Do I know this person?”
Most of the time, I follow the norms and refrain from greeting people on the streets in India. On the odd occasion when I feel adventurous, I greet a stranger — people have greeted me back with a smile on more occasions than I expected.
I should offer a disclaimer — in a culture where greeting strangers is uncommon, men should be careful before greeting random women on the street — the last thing you’d want to do is scare them or creep them out.
4 — Clean Up After You Finish Your Meal
In the US, after a meal at McDonald's, you have to leave the table clean for the next customer — you are responsible for cleaning up after yourself.
Thanks to its large population, resources are not a problem in India. It is acceptable etiquette here to leave the table without cleaning up after yourself — there are people whose job description is to clean your table.
The lesson from my US Mcdonald's visits stays — I clean up after myself after a veggie burger at Mcdonald's.
Oh, another lesson I learned the hard way — you don’t get vegetarian burgers at Mcdonald's in the USA (having heard a lot about Mcdonald's while in India, and being a vegetarian, I was bitterly disappointed).
5 — A Sense of Curiosity
My friend’s family invited me to their house for Thanksgiving.
My friend’s father displayed a healthy sense of curiosity about India, my culture, and asked me several questions. He even brought a map and asked me to point out where I was from.
My friend’s father is not the only one.
I’ve seen people in the US have a healthy sense of curiosity about the way the world works. Kids routinely take old computers and take them apart to learn about computers. Do-it-yourself projects are not uncommon, people love shopping at IKEA.
Growing up, I’ve not been a curious person.
I’ve been inspired by the folks with high curiosity quotients to become more interested in how things work.
6 — Self-Reliance
American children are taught to rely on themselves.
Right from a young age, children are encouraged to earn their own income — paper routes, shoveling snow, mowing lawn, getting a summer job — the possibilities are endless.
By contrast, most Indian kids start their first job after graduating from college.
My college roommate, who had worked jobs all his life, was surprised when I didn’t consider applying for a job during my summer break — “Are you going to sit home and do nothing?” he asked me incredulously.
It struck me that a side-effect of not earning your own income when growing up is over-reliance on parents to take care of your needs.
We come into this world alone, and after the end of our journey, we depart alone.
Self-reliance, therefore, is an essential skill everyone should learn.
Life lessons are available everywhere — if we keep our eyes open.
Living in a new country introduces us to ideas, concepts and possibilities that we couldn’t have imagined living in our hometown.
Indeed, living in the USA for 9 years taught me rich lessons.
Lessons that I cherish — lessons that made me a better person.
Are there any lessons you learned living in a different city or country? Let me know in the comments section!
