Body Age Buster
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Body Age Buster

A Kind of Loneliness: When Your Cancer Comes Back

I was equanimous yet fearful — if that’s not a contraction

Walter and Misha August 2015 | Image credit: The Author

I learnt to be an Explorer

What I find remarkable is my calmness today compared to the first time. I did a lot of self-reflection after the first round of cancer and after my marriage break-down.

It’s not easy to follow your own advice

But even our own theories and practices are hard to follow in all circumstances. I slipped into Searcher mode a few times today:

  • Perhaps I should have tried harder to pay my life insurance premium?
  • Perhaps I should have kept up the quarterly cancer checks even when the surgeon suggested we make it annual?
  • Perhaps the radiation will work?
  • How will I pay for any of this treatment?

What IS the urge to share?

However, I did notice a little loneliness creeping in. I’m not the lonely type.



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Walter Adamson

Optimistically curious, 70+ trail runner; 2X cancer; diabetic; Click “FOLLOW” for living longer better tips | My Newsletter 👉