Dating
Dating… Some people hate dating and some love it. For me I have mostly loved the periods in time when I actively dated. I enjoyed getting to know someone new, dining at new restaurants and when there was a connection where we could just talk for hours as if we have known each other forever. I also especially enjoyed when the planning was left up to the guy and I was left pleasantly surprised by what he planned. Dating can be fun, but it can also be disaturous. Today I want to talk about my experience with a bad date, more specifically a bad first date. *Insert scary horror movie music*
Surprisingly, I only have one bad date story. I was in my early twenties. There was this guy that I worked with. He was cute but I wasn’t attracted to him and honestly, I thought he was kinda a cornball. I mean, maybe that is a bit harsh. But he came off as arrogant, with a big mouth and he was always bragging about himself or what he had (money, girls, etc.). Which was a turn off to me, but we were cool. I did not mind interacting with him at work because he made me laugh, but I knew he was not my type. You know when you just know, it will not work, or it is not worth your time? Well, those were the vibes.
However, he was persistent with asking me out and I would always make excuses because I did not want to be rude or hurt his feelings. One random night after work, I finally gave in and agreed to a date. He drove us from work in his car to a popular sports bar for dinner and drinks. It was going okay because as I mentioned, we were cool, and I did not mind holding a conversation with him since he kept me laughing. Sometimes with him and sometimes at him.
Fast forward, conversation is going well. We are talking about lots of random things, nothing major or personal. But like 2 friends enjoying dinner. We finish off some Barbeque or buffalo chicken wings. I go to grab a napkin going to wipe the sauce off my hands but suddenly, he reaches across and grabs my hand. Now in this moment I am thinking “Oh gosh, he’s about to try to hold my hand” my dirty hand that has chicken sauce on my fingers! I quickly realize I am mistaken as he pulls my hand closer to his mouth, so my thoughts go into “ughhhh, he’s about to kiss my hand” I try not to make a big deal about it or even try to pull away. I don’t want to embarrass him or cause a scene, because “what’s a quick hand kiss” right? Wrong!
Well, to my surprise he takes my hand, kisses it, and then proceeded to take my middle finger and place it in. His. Mouth. as he Sucked. My. Finger clean. AHHHHHHHH!!! At this point, I am flabbergasted and disgusted! One, because how did we get here? What did I say to make him think this was okay? And two, because if you know me, you know I hate spit (might sound a bit dramatic but it is true). So random spit on my finger from a guy I have no interest in has me wanting to run to the bathroom to scrub my hands. Which i did by the way, right after I quickly pulled my hand back and away from him before he decided to suck another finger! Honestly, If I had drove my own vehicle and we didn’t work together, I would have left the restaurant and never spoke to him again but since we do work together and I had no car with me, I went back to the table. He appeared to be confused by my sudden exit. I am sure my face explained every thought and feeling I was having in that moment because I’m one of those people whose face tells it all. However, I quickly explained how I felt and kept things light so there would be no awkwardness between us. After we left the restaurant silence filled the air as he drove me back to my car. Needless to say, we never spoke about this night again, nor did we ever go on another date.
While I know that this isn’t the worst dating story out there, it was the worst for me. All in all, it was really a good lesson for me on dating and life in general. I learned that I need to trust my instincts and if I am not interested in someone, do not put myself in an uncomfortable situation. Because while I was trying not to hurt his feelings, I ended up putting myself in an awkward situation. But even if you have a bad date or twenty don’t stop dating. Go on all the dates for the experiences and to keep yourself open to the idea of meeting someone new. There will be good ones and bad ones, but its all a learning lesson. You learn about yourself and you learn what you like and don’t like, and what you can and wont put up with.
