Finding Purpose and Fulfillment

The following is adapted from Planting Your Purpose by Alec Kassan

When it comes to finding one’s calling or pursuing more fulfillment, we are often met with popular suggestions to…

“Just do what you’re good at,” or “Do what you’re passionate about.”

Although this advice may sound good, there’s not much substance in terms of how to act on it. Plus, we’ve all had jobs or pursued projects in the past where we did the things we loved but still found ourselves unfulfilled or feeling as though God was calling us toward something greater.

Can you recall what your first job was?

For some of you, getting that first job was probably an exciting time because you saw the work as a stepping-stone toward greater opportunities. For others, you may have taken the job simply out of necessity. Either way, I’m sure you took the job based on what the job could provide for you, and I’m also sure you aren’t still working there.

Maybe you left because there was a better gig. Maybe you stopped working there because it wasn’t paying enough. Or maybe you quit because it was a toxic work environment. But imagine if you still worked at that first job. Imagine the unfulfillment and passionless life you would have been living if you still worked there.

Now imagine if you went the rest of your life still working at that same job.

Doesn’t sound very pleasant or fulfilling, does it? In fact, I’m sure you feel like you’d be wasting your life if you did that.

The first job I ever worked wasn’t anywhere close to feeling fulfilling. During my sophomore year in high school, I applied to work in one of those stereotypical busboy jobs at a local Italian restaurant.

Growing up in church, I learned to find satisfaction in serving others. So being able to serve and get paid for it was truly amazing at the time.

My friend Evan, who was also a sophomore, had reassured me that being a busboy with him would be good. Evan was confident that us working together would be constant fun.

He told me about all the money he was making, saying how the extra cash gave him so much freedom! He could buy his own video games and order his own food, all without needing to ask, or beg, for his parents’ permission. But the thing that convinced me to take the job was the amazing leftover food. After the restaurant closed, we got to take home all the prepared food that wasn’t served.

The typical work schedule entailed leaving school at 2:30 p.m. sharp, getting to the neighboring town’s upscale Italian restaurant at 3 p.m., and working till about 2 a.m. The pay was okay, but the tips were fantastic, and the free food was delicious!

However, the long hours and late nights soon got to me. The work was constant, my back was aching, and the pay started to not seem worth the time and energy. I barely saw my friend Evan since we were continuously running around the restaurant. My motivation to stay faded rapidly.

When I made up my mind to quit, I walked into the kitchen, went to the manager, and put in my two weeks’ notice. His response was rather shocking.

In his thick Italian accent, he emphatically exclaimed, “What is dis two-week notice? You work, you stay, you quit, you leave!”

The kitchen went silent. I was at a loss of words.

All the staff froze and stared at the manager and me. I tried explaining that I would be willing to work until I could be replaced, but I was quickly met again with the sharp reply, “No, no, no. You work, you stay, you quit, you leave.”

So I left. I lasted three months at that job.

How is it that we can start something feeling very zealous, but end up falling out of love with what we are doing?

Maybe you’ve struggled with a sense of purpose or fulfillment too. When there are many possibilities ahead of you, sometimes it’s hard to know the best way to go. It seems that any option is a good option. But deep down, we all want to know, which option is best?

When I quit working as a busboy, I felt a strange shift in my spirit, as though my character was being challenged or my identity was being tested. At that point in my high school career, I had grown to see myself as the type of person who doesn’t quit when times get tough.

During the summer prior to taking the busboy job or even starting high school, I was mistakenly signed up to join the high school football team. My friend Tarek had confused me for one of our other friends, Tom, who had expressed interest in playing. Since Tom and I were both overweight, out of shape, and had the same chubby faces, it made sense why my friend Tarek would have confused us.

Instead of ignoring my friend’s plea to join the football team, I reluctantly found myself walking on the field for the first day of practice.

Within the first few minutes, coach Satchell shared some wisdom with us that clearly communicated how serious he was about this sport and our involvement in it. He said, “From this point moving forward I want you all to know, if you show up to practice on time, you’re late. If you’re early, you’re on time. And if you’re late, don’t even bother showing up!”

This stern and authoritative presence of coach Satchell had alienated many of the other kids, but I found his personality and booming presence to be inspiring.

After the first day of practice, I approached him to let him know I didn’t think I belonged and couldn’t do well on the team. I had no experience in playing football and wasn’t any good at the sport, far from it. Many of the kids were better than me and enjoyed the sport way more than I did, which is probably why they signed up in the first place. In contrast, I had accidentally been signed up, and it wasn’t even me who did it!

Satchell pointed out that even though the other kids might enjoy football, many of them will quit. For them, joining the team might have started with a passion for the sport or a joy in watching it. However, staying on the team, and doing well, would require more than simply liking the sport.

Coach Satchell began to explain…

“The older boys on this team that do well are the ones who see this sport as something beyond just themselves. They aren’t here to simply rack up points on a scoreboard or have a good time. They are here because their identity is in how they perform.

“These boys are trying to become better athletes, which means they are working to grow physically and mentally in order to step into that role. They are here because the way they act and overcome challenges on the field is how they’ll learn how to act and overcome challenges in the real world.

“If you don’t want to be a better football player, then fine. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t find a greater purpose for being here.”

This short talk had me reconsider my decision to leave the team. I thought that by not being super passionate about this sport, I wouldn’t benefit from playing it, and the team wouldn’t benefit from me being there. Yet from Satchell’s experience, he explained that the students who had a higher purpose for playing were the ones that could endure the hardest challenges, have the greatest growth, and bring the most value to the team.

After our talk, I could see that Coach Satchell started to train me in a slightly different way than the rest of the teammates. He wasn’t being easier on me. If anything, he knew exactly how to challenge me to my breaking points in every practice.

The way that Satchell trained me differently was by identifying and coaching me toward a higher purpose. He could see that my chubby, soft outside reflected how I felt on the inside. What I wanted was to walk with the same authority and confidence that he had, along with the other influential men in my life. Satchell knew that appealing to the nobler purpose of becoming a stronger and more committed man would be the driving force to help me persevere through practice.

From that point on, I would be on that field at 6:30 a.m. six days a week for my freshman, sophomore, and senior years of high school.

How is it that I could endure three years playing a sport that I did not like, did not get paid for, and wasn’t good at…but couldn’t endure three months in a job that was air-conditioned, paid well, and wasn’t nearly as physically taxing?

Only when I look back can I say that purpose and calling were a key factor as to why I was able to stay on the team, and other kids couldn’t. It’s also why I couldn’t last as a busboy for three months but could be out in the blazing cold and frigid winters just to get tackled.

I believe it is having a purpose, a sense of calling, that allows one to endure. There was a clear vision as to why I was on that football field. It was so I could no longer be a sappy boy and could instead become a strong and unrelenting young man.

The mission, the way in which I would reach the vision, was through experiencing two-a-day practices, showing up every day, and leaving any excuses I had off the field, which is quite contradictory to the common career advice we hear: “Do what you’re good at or passionate about.”

Calling and purpose are not things that require a dramatic epiphany moment. They don’t come from living in the woods or going up to an isolated mountain top. They aren’t some singular magical moment where God parts the clouds and clearly writes everything out in the sky.

If you’d like more information on finding purpose and fulfillment you can find Planting Your Purpose on Amazon.

Creator and host of the YouTube channel The Current Christian, Alec Kassan expresses a clear passion and drive to help others succeed in their walk with Christ and is understood to be a modern-day man after God’s heart.

Alec’s ingenious outside the box thinking and problem-solving capabilities, pairs beautifully with his organized and thorough process of teaching. This combination makes for a refreshing and encouraging way of understanding how to live a fruitful life, and what it means to have Jesus is at the center of it.

With a Bachelor of Science from the School of Education at Syracuse University, Alec brings a unique analytical, yet still imaginative, perspective to the Christian community.