Get Outside Your Comfort Zone
The following is adapted from Thirteen Waves by Lee D. Beck
Take a breath. Dive. I look under the water to understand why I am not moving towards shore. The leash of my board is caught on the reef and I’m stuck inside the wave. My board is banging into me and the reef is just behind me. The leash is the only thing keeping me from crashing into the reef. I know how sharp the reef is, I already have several cuts on my feet from the last ten days. If I go spinning into it, my skin will be shredded. I try to hold my breath and wait out the set of waves. It seems endless. I try to reach the reef and untangle my leash, but the waves keep breaking on me, pushing me back.
I have three options. I can release the leash and risk being forcefully pushed into the reef. I can count the waves and the seconds between, timing my breaths with the cadence, and hope I can wait it out. Or I can drown. Option two sounds best.
My mind dials up a random fact I learned just a few hours earlier from a diver from Hong Kong. The human body can exist for another sixty seconds after convulsions when gasping for air underwater. I have at least another minute for someone to get to me. Though, to be honest, does that seem likely? I’m surfing in the Indian Ocean off the Maldives and swam in from a float plane. Getting to me will not be easy as I’m caught on the “inside.” I start counting waves.
A flash of memory hits me. When I was very young, I used to bob all alone in the water and count how many waves I could do before exhaustion. I know the average set at this reef is seven waves. I am at ten and the last swell was big, adding pressure that compressed me further down on the reef. Eleven, twelve, thirteen. This has to be the last one…
Four months prior to this trip, I had left my job and spent time with my kids. I was just awakening to the idea of focusing on what I wanted to do instead of living for everyone else. This trip was about getting out of my normal space and seeing the world through different lenses. I didn’t want to tour, or sightsee. I wanted to experience. I wanted to get out of my comfort zone and accomplish something interesting.
I wanted to surf the Indian Ocean. Two days before I left, I sat down and became a devil’s advocate. I listed every single reason I shouldn’t leave. I was leaving my sons, I would be off the radar, I wouldn’t be able to use my cell phone, I would be at crazy altitudes of 15,000 to 19,000 feet and had no idea if my body could handle it anymore. Also surfing the reefs in the Indian Ocean was dangerous. What if something happened? How would my boys even learn about it if something happened to me? There were so many reasons not to go, and I was on the verge of cancelling the whole thing. But there was a constant voice saying, “Why not?”
This has to be the last one…I’d been underwater for some time now — thirteen waves long — and my lungs were burning.
Luckily, that thirteenth wave was the last one. I was immediately relieved. I suddenly could move forward and out to sea a little bit more. I dove down and unwrapped my leash from the coral. As I glided on my board across the crystal-clear water, I could see the reef underneath me. It was beautiful. Minutes ago, it had been close to tearing me apart, but now it was peaceful. I started paddling back to the plane. I was exhausted. Getting caught on the inside was physically and emotionally draining. It dawned on me that thirteen waves was a really long set. Counting had made me calmer and helped me to rationally think about how to navigate the waves. It translated to a bigger lesson in my life. When you pause, think, and take time to assess your surroundings, you can pretty much get through anything. In that moment, I was reminded what I was capable of.
That experience of paddling back to the float plane was a special moment in time. I looked around at the beautiful waves and the bright colors of the fish, not a cloud in the sky. It was like surfing in an aquarium. It was gorgeous, stunning. My thought was, “Well, if I can do that, I can do anything.” So then I asked myself, “What do I really want to do? What excites me the most?” I felt completely relaxed in the moment. I knew I could accomplish whatever I wanted to do. Anything was possible. If you take your time, breathe, fight through the difficult times, and if you really want it for you and not for everyone else, you can do it.
When the surf trip was done and I was ensconced in the luxury hotel, I had a drink with my guides on the porch. The sea was like glass and one of them told me it was only like that two times a year, for a week or two between winter and summer, and right now, in late November between seasons. Usually around that time there is also a lot of rain, but I’d had nothing but sun every day I had been there. The guide looked at me and smiled.
“It’s almost a miracle that you can look at the water this calm. It is your spirit giving it to you.”
My last weeks there, I started practicing yoga and meditating. I felt amazing. My whole world was coming together, and in two days I would get back to my kids. I was right to take the trip. I needed to get out of my surroundings, the trappings of my everyday life, unattached to technology, to get to know myself. I started a whole new path of what I wanted to do.
When I came back, I heard the same thing over and over. “You seem so happy! You look so relaxed!”
I was. And for the first time, I really felt in charge of my own life.
For more insightful guidance on how to take control and live a happy life, you can find Thirteen Waves on Amazon.
Lee D. Beck was a recruited college athlete who became an assistant professor and assistant coach before he transitioned into financial services. Lee held various executive roles at PIMCO, J.P. Morgan, and Blackrock, and has earned his BSE, MA, and MBA. A math and reading development volunteer for at-risk city school districts, Lee commits a portion of his earnings to charities focused on urban development. Lee enjoys searching for rural surf breaks to watch the ocean and enjoy the ride.
